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#12
08-05-2011, 10:43 PM
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WW, next time you talk to her, I guess to break it off, you can tell her that you want her to recall the beauty and love of that last time. So, you don't think that either your wife or gf would want to be in a polyamorous situation with you? I mean, this is a poly board and you have not mentioned whether you wanted poly or not, only that you had originally cheated.
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. Independent solo polyamorist seeking lover-friends willing to invest in friendship, companionship, and love, but without a need for partnership. Never confuse commitment with exclusivity, love with ownership, nor sex with intimacy! For me, it is far better to grasp the Universe as it really is than to persist in delusion, however satisfying and reassuring. 
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#13
08-06-2011, 01:51 AM
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Sometimes we think we know people, but you dont really know what you are dealing with, until the proverbial shit hits the fan. So,..in the 'be careful' spirit, I wouldnt be surprised if she looked back on the last few sexual encounters and doubted his intentions. She has previously made him aware, how devestated she would be, if he left her. and for the record,..I truly like to be wrong on such matters. 
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#14
08-08-2011, 04:37 PM
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My wife is open to exploring poly, though she herself does not want involvement with anyone on a sexual level other then me. My GF was originally into the idea of exploring poly, she was with her SS partner at the time we first got together so, not wanting to end her existing relationship, poly looked like a good option for her.
My wife is still open to try it but since my GF split with her SO, she now wants us to be mono. I just can't see that working for me, I think I am wired poly, and I have a wife who is understanding enough to let me be, unfortunately the 3rd party I chose to be poly with want's me to be mono with her. So I know I need to go back to my wife and if the opportunity to try poly arises again I need to address it the "Right Way". It's not even about sex for me, I just want to be able to love and care for and provide for all the people in my life that I love. Unfortunately right now my GF's possessiveness won't permit me to do that. I understand her values are her values, I won't ask her to change them for my sake. But I know it's going to hurt us both terribly when I finally end things, which is going to be soon, as I can't take the stress much more.
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#15
08-08-2011, 07:32 PM
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I'm still interested how and why you moved out of the house you shared with your wife and kids? How long were you dating this other women? How often do you now see your wife and kids? Do you go on dates and such with your wife. What do the kids think of this?
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#16
08-08-2011, 08:36 PM
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It surprises me that you decided to move out when you could have stayed with your wife and family, and try to maintain the relationship with the girlfriend. Especially if the wife was willing to give polyamory a shot.
One of the biggest fears of any polyamorous couple is that your SO will meet someone new, fall in love, and then end your relationship so they can live with the new lover. It's as if polyamory is merely a guise used to replace one lover with another. How do you plan to convince your wife that any new relationship you explore is not going to jeopardize the one you already have?
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