Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > General Poly Discussions

Notices

 
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Prev Previous Post   Next Post Next
  #1  
Old 08-01-2011, 05:13 PM
Mango Mango is offline
New Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 2
Question Jealousy without possessiveness

Hi, I'm struggling with jealousy issues a bit at the moment and could use some outside opinions from people who don't know me or the other people in question.

I've never really felt jealous in a poly situation before, as I'm not at all possessive of my partner. Poly has always meant her (as my primary partner) being with other people as well as me, not instead of me. When she wants things that I don't want, I have never felt anything other than glad when she finds other people to do those things with so I don't have to worry about it.

Except now I've ended up in a situation where she wants the same things I want, but she doesn't want them with me. There are certain things I'd only really want to do with her, but she only wants to do with other people.

I've ended up feeling, I think, jealous of those people. I don't begrudge her those other interactions at all, I don't want to keep her all to myself. I just wish it wasn't them instead of me, as it makes me feel completely rejected and deficient and massively insecure.

I don't know how to deal with this (mostly as it's very new to me), and I'm not even sure whether it's a reasonable reaction to the situation or not. Anyone have any similar experiences or advice?
Reply With Quote
 

Tags
envy, jealousy

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 02:53 PM.