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  #41  
Old 07-26-2011, 12:47 AM
NeonKaos NeonKaos is offline
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Originally Posted by monopolylover View Post

I am not saying that there are real polys out there or that the concept is flawed. that is what YOU are putting into the conversation, not me.

Right. And we are the ones putting "negativity" into this conversation, not you.

Have you learned ANY lessons from your experiences, or have you set yourself up to repeat the same mistakes over and over due to circumstances that are just unfortunately out of your control no matter what?
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  #42  
Old 07-26-2011, 02:01 AM
monopolylover monopolylover is offline
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I'm sorry, I have had a lot of bad relationships but I've never dated a con artist before. Even at their worst I've never dated anyone who sleeps with people to arrange elaborate cons so there really isn't much reference here to establish a repeating pattern. you are basing your incursion into this thread as a means to accuse something. Maybe this is a repeating pattern with you.
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  #43  
Old 07-26-2011, 02:01 AM
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redpepper redpepper is offline
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Ya, well geesh, she sucked. It does sound like she was using poly as a catch phrase to get what she wanted. There are dating sites that use the term "poly" to cover up cheating. That isn't poly, that is some one scamming you by using that word. I'm glad to hear you recoginze this circumstance was about her, not poly as a whole.
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  #44  
Old 07-26-2011, 02:02 AM
NeonKaos NeonKaos is offline
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Originally Posted by monopolylover View Post
you are basing your incursion into this thread as a means to accuse something. Maybe this is a repeating pattern with you.
Excuse you; what?

"Incursion"?

Excuse you.
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  #45  
Old 07-26-2011, 02:05 AM
monopolylover monopolylover is offline
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Originally Posted by redpepper View Post
Ya, well geesh, she sucked. It does sound like she was using poly as a catch phrase to get what she wanted. There are dating sites that use the term "poly" to cover up cheating. That isn't poly, that is some one scamming you by using that word. I'm glad to hear you recoginze this circumstance was about her, not poly as a whole.
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  #46  
Old 07-26-2011, 02:16 AM
monopolylover monopolylover is offline
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Originally Posted by redpepper View Post
hm. Possible. What say you monopolylover? Sounds like this woman gave you a skewed view of poly, regardless.
It has a lot to do with the dating pool here in the states. For lack of a better word, Americans are psycho. People are ill mannered, get butt hurt over the smallest thing, quick to temper and rarely ever honest or forth coming in relationships. Most in the US see things like polyamory as an opportunity to do what ever they want and call it what it isn't. "I screwed a bunch of girls without telling you,.. well thats just polyamory, don't judge me." Its just like ADD. have you ever noticed the insane amounts of Americans who claim to have it and pump themselves full of drugs for it yet somehow with almost identical social demographics every other major western country has magically avoided the large number of ADD and AADD cases? When Americans want quick excuses, the never have to look far.
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  #47  
Old 07-26-2011, 02:29 AM
Minxxa Minxxa is offline
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Wow I was completely wrong.

Talk about Ill-mannered.
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  #48  
Old 07-26-2011, 02:32 AM
NeonKaos NeonKaos is offline
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Originally Posted by monopolylover View Post
It has a lot to do with the dating pool here in the states. For lack of a better word, Americans are psycho. People are ill mannered, get butt hurt over the smallest thing, quick to temper and rarely ever honest or forth coming in relationships. Most in the US see things like polyamory as an opportunity to do what ever they want and call it what it isn't. "I screwed a bunch of girls without telling you,.. well thats just polyamory, don't judge me." Its just like ADD. have you ever noticed the insane amounts of Americans who claim to have it and pump themselves full of drugs for it yet somehow with almost identical social demographics every other major western country has magically avoided the large number of ADD and AADD cases? When Americans want quick excuses, the never have to look far.

While I agree that a lot of Americans are that way to some extent, what is YOUR agenda? You're American, right? These things must also apply to you. You seem to not have to look very far to find the excuses YOU want. If you are not American and that is how you feel, then why don't you go back to wherever you are from?

I am not saying this to be snarky. I'm simply trying to help you out.

Last edited by NeonKaos; 07-26-2011 at 02:35 AM.
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  #49  
Old 07-26-2011, 03:05 AM
monopolylover monopolylover is offline
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Originally Posted by NeonKaos View Post
While I agree that a lot of Americans are that way to some extent, what is YOUR agenda? You're American, right? These things must also apply to you. You seem to not have to look very far to find the excuses YOU want. If you are not American and that is how you feel, then why don't you go back to wherever you are from?

I am not saying this to be snarky. I'm simply trying to help you out.
Born in Kentucky, raised in Wisconsin. I admit, I still feel pissed and I did a lot of dumb things even being in that relationship. This person lied to everyone around her and being part of that still makes me feel sick. I admit, I was gullible. If I was making excuses i doubt I'd be admitting to that but this was hardly a repeat pattern as you have suggested. This was a full on con artist using polyamory as a tool to manipulate and rob people. I've dated some psychos before and I dated two others who were just 'open' using polyamory as a means to gratify their own devices and manipulate people but I've had plenty of good relationships too and I have known honesty AND love in relationships. you are making to much up on your own from what I've been saying. Yes, I'll say Americans by majority are some crazy and manipulative people by comparison to other western countries. But the statistics agree profoundly with that. It isn't just my own personal experience. That doesn't make me an America basher either. Every country has a sociological dark age (England = the colonial ages/Germany = the early 20th century) and this is still a very young country. We just got done with 8 years of having what has to have been the most retarded and despotic western leader in the last 70 years and we even elected the guy president AFTER he stole his first election. If that doesn't tell you there is something just a weeee bit "off" with the population in general then I simply do not know what else would.
This makes for a precarious social climate if you prefer not to "play games" or be played. Be at times, one or the other is going to happen.

What I am sayin is, as far as polyamory, I've expended the chances I can lend to trusting the next yank who wants to tell me they are doing it and being honest. They may very well be. But I'm not pointing that barrel at MY head ever again.
I may casually date more but I am not going to get into plural sexual relationships as in this climate people tend to over complicate things no matter what side of it they are on.

This cowboy is like the wind and to date the wind, you can't trap it in a box and expect it to still be the wind. It will just be a box of stale air. Isn't that the same that any true poly would expect?
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  #50  
Old 07-26-2011, 03:08 AM
NeonKaos NeonKaos is offline
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Originally Posted by monopolylover View Post
you are making to much up on your own from what I've been saying.

Stop saying that. Just stop it. All I or anyone else have done is repeat back to you what you said and ask you if that's really what you mean. Then you come back and say we made everything up and then you repeat exactly what you said before already.

I have no further use for this conversation.
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