Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > General Poly Discussions


Thread Tools Display Modes
Prev Previous Post   Next Post Next
Old 07-20-2011, 10:36 PM
ClariceK ClariceK is offline
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 32
Default Work Situations

I have been having some thoughts and concerns and wanted to bring them up here to ask about others experiences with this. I am writing to you because I dont know if this is jealousy (I don't think it is) or if it is my true internal safety mechanism that tells me things aren't a good idea.

SU and DJ work at the same time in different places a few blocks away. SU gets out over a hour before DJ gets out of work. She walks over and meets him at his work and waits in the car till he is done with his work. I don't have a problem with this situation except that I don't feel comfortable with the fact that he kisses her while he is at work and has done this in front of other coworkers and it makes me uncomfortable.

We are pretty much out as a family in public, but I feel as if hubby's work is not a place to be kissing someone other then his wife. I think it looks even worse when I am not there. I think that his work should be handled as a "off limits area" as far as PDA goes. I feel as if it gives the impression of his "having a secret affair with their roommate or friend" and thus looks bad. I find this to be even more important of a issue if DJ goes into management at his work because honestly there will be situations in which she will not be going as his "wife" because I would be taking that role and I feel it would make social situations hard for me. There was already one situation in which there was a picnic with his work friends and families and the comment was made about her and he being in the pool frolicking together with her swimming between his legs "I wouldn't let another woman that close ot my husbands penis" was the comment made and looks were passed among the other "wives" that made me feel like I just wanted to leave the picnic. They (DJ and SU) didn't see a problem with it (of course they didn't they were playing and acting like 10 year olds at a picnic where they were the only ones roughhousing over the age of 8) which was another thing that I felt was inappropriate.

Am I being bitchy or do you guys think my concerns are valid. I have always looked at it like if this relationship DOESNT work out, she goes off and I am left being seen as the wife who's husband fooled around on her and didn't even care or worse yet was too dumb to even notice it. Maybe I am just having a crappy day and thinking of negatives because hubby worked today instead of spending the day with me like he could have done when he was offered the day off.
Reply With Quote

boundaries, jealousy, triad

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

All times are GMT. The time now is 01:41 PM.