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  #31  
Old 07-11-2011, 05:10 AM
floundering floundering is offline
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Redpepper,
The new gf did break up with my gf. As far as I am concerned that is the end of this. I am not willing to go through this again. I don't think I am suited for poly and I hope that my gf and I are able to make a mono relationship work. I feel confidant that we can, she just has to come to it without resentment of the fact that the new gf left over a demand that she didn't like.
thanks again.
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  #32  
Old 07-11-2011, 05:26 AM
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This thread has me very confused. What letter?
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  #33  
Old 07-11-2011, 05:39 AM
floundering floundering is offline
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Default the letter

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tonberry View Post
If your girlfriend wants you to write your reasons, she should let you write your reasons and not dictate what you get to write. Plus that wording sounds like you're asking for a peace treaty from the leader of another country. It's really weird.

I think you should stand your ground and write the letter the way you'd write it, or not write one at all.


It was requested of me that I write a letter to the new gf to request a meeting. So I did so.
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  #34  
Old 07-11-2011, 07:27 AM
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I don't think thus forum can accurately evaluate how considerate or how creepy any letter was without seeing all the details. From what floundering says, I don't think such an evaluation would matter. The facts as presented mean floundering and gf are back on track.

Floundering... I hope you and gf are able to figure out what gf was looking for. If your both mono-wired but fell into a poly situation, then please check for shirt circuits so you aren't shocked in the future.

Though it's moot at this point, let me offer some sage advice...
1) You and any partner's other partner have something in common: you both care about that partner in common. Having something in common is an automatic reason to have affinity with someone else. Just beware the beast if jealousy.

2) No matter how scary any new partner is for an existing partner, that new person had some value that caught the attention of your partner. Sometimes it is better to focus on what about that person attracted your partner as a way to enjoy that variety rather than worry about competition or flaws.

Poly or mono or don't know... Be good to each other. *hug*
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  #35  
Old 07-11-2011, 07:29 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by floundering View Post
It was requested of me that I write a letter to the new gf to request a meeting. So I did so.
Yeah, I saw other posters responding to you about a letter, but I've read this thread up and down and didn't see where you said your gf wanted you to write a letter, so I was confused. Was that in another thread?

I saw this and couldn't figure out what wording she was referring to. It's not in any of your posts here:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tonberry View Post
Plus that wording sounds like you're asking for a peace treaty from the leader of another country. It's really weird.
Just trying to follow the situation to understand correctly.
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Last edited by nycindie; 07-11-2011 at 07:38 AM.
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  #36  
Old 07-11-2011, 12:44 PM
floundering floundering is offline
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Default the letter

nycindie,
I had mentioned in a previous post that my partner asked me to write a letter "requesting" a meeting with the new gf because the new gf was unhappy that a "demand" was being made. My partner wanted me to use specific language in the letter that didn't feel natural for me but I did it. I removed the posts within 12 hours due to having been too identifying.
sagency,
i'm not sure anything is moot for the new gf could change her mind. I would gladly place the whole letter here redacting names if I thought it would help.
Do let me know and I'll see how it reads without names etc.
thank you all,
flounder
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  #37  
Old 07-11-2011, 06:04 PM
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The posts about the letter were likely edited.
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