Originally Posted by River
If you're just a nice playful boy toy for the moment, well....
I don't think I'm just some boy toy to her, and I do believe she has some really legitimate feelings towards me. I may have painted her a little too negatively by mistake. She is an amazing person with no ill will towards anyone. I just seem to be having an issue with her relationship lifestyle. I have tried acclimating myself to being in this poly relationship, but it just isn't working for me.
I'm up at night wondering, can this sort of thing work out if I want to live with her? Could we possibly have kids some day? Could we own a house together? Family type stuff. But when I think of other people in the relationship, that sort of stuff (things I've dreamed about) seem out of reach.