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Old 06-30-2011, 02:36 PM
Aleighagurl Aleighagurl is offline
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: NC, USA
Posts: 7
Red face Total N00b, but hopefully not for long. :)

Hey there! I'm new to the forum (obviously) but I'm pretty eager to jump in and hear about other people's situations. I'm new to the poly lifestyle as well...kind of. It's complicated; but I'm guessing that's a common theme around here.

Anyway, I'm female and I've been with my male partner for 5 years. Within the past year we starting have casual flings with other people just for the sake of fun. He had a lot of fun with this but I was noticing that I just didn't enjoy it as much unless I had some kind of relationship with whoever I was with, at least a friendship. So I started seeking out a Fwb kind of relationship and met a wonderful girl who clicked with me instantly.

Now I'm head over heals for her and she's definitely more than a friend. I don't love my boyfriend any less and, in fact, feel like I'm able to show him more love now that I'm not as depressed as often. Since meeting this girl I've become quite satisfied with my life in general and no longer feel the need to seek out casual relationships at all.

I've heard articles about polyamory say that some people are just "wired to be poly" I wonder if you guys think that's true, and if so maybe I'm one of those people. All I know is that I wouldn't want to replace my relationship with my man for anything, and I'm really grateful that I've been able to date my girl at the same time. I just feel so happy and fulfilled!

I'm not without my issues though, I think my man feels jealous and insecure sometimes even thought I really try to do my best to make him feel loved and important. He's having trouble with the idea that he's not "enough" for me...but my feeling is that one person is never enough for anyone and that's why we rely on our friends, parents, siblings, children, pets, etc. What are your thoughts?

So that's my story thus far and that's where I'm at now. If you're in or have ever been in a similar situation I'd love to hear about it. So long for now!
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Old 06-30-2011, 09:16 PM
AutumnalTone AutumnalTone is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Kansas City Metro
Posts: 2,187

Welcome aboard.
When speaking of various forms of non-monogamy...it ain't poly if you're just fucking around.

While polyamory, open relationships, and swinging are all distinctly different approaches to non-monogamy, they are not mutually exlusive. Folks can, and some do, engage in more than one of them at a time--and it's all good.
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