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  #11  
Old 10-13-2009, 09:10 PM
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aussielover aussielover is offline
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I can understand the excitement being held back. Was this before you got the info on how the trip actually went?
I'm glad things seem to be going in the right direction for you *HUGS*
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  #12  
Old 10-13-2009, 09:24 PM
HappiestManAlive HappiestManAlive is offline
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All weekend was very... Tense. We didn't know what was going to happen when she got back. And instead of happy happy joy joy that all was well - in fact, to hear it from her, better than ever - I felt restrained, "capped" on my emotions.

Now in all fairness, I was running on 2 hours sleep and a lot of other stresses, but that I'm used to, never been an issue.

Part of it I have identified. I am struggling with her lack of complete honesty with him, it causes the little devil voice in my head to say "Are you sure she's being honest with you? She lies to HIM..." and whatnot. Every time I felt like I should see the evil smug devil saying "she likes you better" or "see? she doesn't want him" - the negative but reassuring voice - I heard the negative doubting one. I brought this up later, she wasn''t upset and totally understood. The annoying thing is, I don't think she lies to us at all. I know she doesn't. It;s just that that seed is hard to uproot, lol.

The smaller issue is simple male competitive jealousy; knowing she was intimate with him, etc. But that one I know well and have dealt with years ago, lol. Not an issue, really, just a thought adjustment and a laugh-at-self treatment.

I think we just need a good evening with plenty of time to adjust to her being back and the worry being gone. We'll see.
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  #13  
Old 10-14-2009, 11:36 PM
HappiestManAlive HappiestManAlive is offline
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Update - last night was rough, and into today - but in a good way.

After this weekend in SF with Mike, Anne came back happy as hell to see us and upset about how he acted all weekend. This triggered a long talk yesterday about that situation. After that talk, Violet and I felt good that Anne was getting it straight in her head and making her decision on how to handle it, be it stay with him but be honest, or leave us, or leave him. We thought that she'd think it over and decide what to do over teh next couple weeks and we could look forward to a resolution that would take that load off her back soon.

Well, we always say that once she makes up her mind, she makes up her mind...

We got a call from a bawling crying Anne t 1:30 this morning. Mike called, and she broke up with him, just like that. Didn't dump it on him about me (he kows about Violet), but told him that regardless of what else was going on, she knew that they weren't going to make it and that if they didn't end it now, it would end worse later. Mike did not take this well. She stuck to her guns. And called us crying afterwards. We've been taking turns leaving work on extended lunches to console her and make sure she gets to class and work okay as she's quite a mess about it, and we'll be staying over there tonight at her timid request.

So - it's a good thing, but we're going to be helping a very sad Anne for a while now. Hopefully Mike gets his around things and they can salvage the freindship they had before.
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