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Old 06-05-2011, 01:22 PM
charis charis is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 1
Default surprised to find my bf is poly

My bf has recently come to me discussing the possibilities of an open relationship. I was initially open to the idea and very excited about it. I had no idea what i was in for and am now very confused.

He started to see another woman that i have previously met at a social function. she came came to him looking for an open relationship and i okayed it as long as he took it slow and made sure she knew exactly what she was getting into. Apparently she lied about her age, found out she is only 18 after they started dating. He is 30 and i am 36. She was originally going to be involved in our relationship until i found out her age. She has become jealous of me and i of her. They go out on dates multiple times a week and any night they are not dating, they are texting each other hours on end.

I would like for us to find a third person in our lives. I believe that we can have a great thing. My problem is this specific person. She does not comprehend my relationship with my bf and does not like me. She will not speak to me and even makes negative comments about me to him.

I don't feel threatened by her but i am trying to find a balance. I have requested that they don't text while in my house. I understand it may have to happen on occasion but it can not be daily. I have also requested that my time comes first and i can not continue to alter my plans for her and not the other way around. We can't even plan a night out anymore because she may want to do something that night and our plans will get canceled.

I know he loves me and this is new to the both of us. I know that i am jealous and a bit demanding but i need to stand my ground. I also know that this is new to him and he is very excited. I can't handle the age nor the amount of attention she gets.

Am i asking too much and how do i handle the inital jealousy? We have had an amazing relationship up until this point and he has always been very open and honest with me. I am so scared and confused right now...
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