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Old 05-30-2011, 04:57 AM
girluv4u girluv4u is offline
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 11
Default 3rd wheel

i get the pet thing, i've been there, its just i have been bumped over anything and everyone, now a cat?

your right we all need to talk but instead of saying how i feel i think im going to ask what their indevidule idea of poly is and what their expectations are...
its really hard when you dont know where you fit in or if you fit in, when you feel like you do. i've excepted them, but dont feel it returned ( by a primary)
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Old 05-30-2011, 05:16 AM
nycindie's Avatar
nycindie nycindie is offline
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Big Apple
Posts: 10,083

It sounds like you are always asking them for time. This is a triad, right? Why not take the approach of "Here are the dates that work for me, let me know if you can get together. If not, I'm making other plans." Don't sit around and wait. Be the one in charge.
The world opens up... when you do.

"Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me." ~Bryan Ferry
"Love and the self are one . . ." ~Leo Buscaglia

Click here for a Solo Poly view on hierarchical relationships
Click here to find out why the Polyamorous Misanthrope is feeling disgusted.
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Old 05-30-2011, 05:57 AM
girluv4u girluv4u is offline
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 11
Default 3rd wheel

it hit me what you said, your right..i'm always asking for time. i want to be apart of it.. but not seeing it returned.. i think i know what i have to do whether i want to or not

thank you
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Old 06-03-2011, 12:43 AM
girluv4u girluv4u is offline
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 11
Default 3rd wheel

problem resolved...he Quit. didnt even try.. her response? i'm happy it wont effect work. ( we work togeather) i'm sorry here but that is not poly.. worried about where the money comes from rather then whats important in life, love and family after i explained it to her? ... is not poly... i can say in time he wil see he is with the wrong woman, and i dont mean me, i mean he should live with the one that has been around the longest. and leave the one who is clealy after everything for the wrong reasons as a secondary.

she has taken his poly life ( again) and made it for just her. and he doesn't even see it... i wont be the last girl he goes threw

thank you all for your help, it mean ALOT
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last on the list, secondary, triad

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