That's a good point actually. Saying to her that you just want to see if she is okay might be an idea. I'm a big fan of letting people know that I am asking for my own feelings to be soothed as much as to give them a chance to sooth thier's. I often say things like, "you don't have to go into a a bunch of stuff but could you give me some idea that you have been thinking about things and where you are getting with that?"
Anyone want to be friends on Facebook?
Send me your name via PM