Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > General Poly Discussions

Notices

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #21  
Old 04-17-2011, 08:05 PM
redpepper's Avatar
redpepper redpepper is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,632
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by SourGirl View Post
I see it much like growing a garden.( dorky analogy, please follow.).... We are all growing different parts of our relationships, at different times and in different places. Much like a garden that needs various aspects of care, depending on what you have planted that year.
I like this analogy.

I would also add, from my own thoughts, that gardens all contain the same aspects and often the same plants. They all need soil, water, sun, and perhaps even rocks and some shade. What makes them different is in the tending.

I tend my garden differently than others. I might allow mine to grow wild; it might be a sustainable; parts might be more tended and cultivated than others. I might have a garden of all local species and native plants or have a garden with wood chips around bushes. I might concentrate solely on veggies rather than being concerned with flower care. Each to their own, yet all are just as valid and beautiful.

I also think of my neighbours when it comes to gardens. One neighbour I have is very concerned that I don't mow the lawn as much as I should because I have daffodils growing in it and a flower that is indigenous to our area. They have given up on telling me I should mow at this point.

Other neighbours want to put weed killer on their dandelions which is against the bi-law here, but they don't care and want to do it anyway. I keep my dandelions as they are the only green thing when the dry season comes and it makes the lawn look green in that time of the summer... along with the buttercups. I am sure that others have a really hard time with that but, meh, what concern is that of mine as long as nothing goes to seed and blows there way I am good doing what I want with the property I have.

Yes, gardens and poly rules/boundaries. Totally a good analogy

Sorry again TP! Geesh, this can be moved to a new thread also if it warrants further discussion.
__________________
Anyone want to be friends on Facebook?
Send me your name via PM
My blog
Reply With Quote
  #22  
Old 04-19-2011, 02:19 AM
nycindie's Avatar
nycindie nycindie is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Big Apple
Posts: 6,760
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by redpepper View Post
I keep my dandelions as they are the only green thing when the dry season comes and it makes the lawn look green in that time of the summer...
Plus they're so useful medicinally, and full of vitamins, minerals, and especially potassium!
__________________
Hot chick in the city.

Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me.
~Bryan Ferry
Reply With Quote
  #23  
Old 04-20-2011, 02:16 AM
redpepper's Avatar
redpepper redpepper is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,632
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by nycindie View Post
Plus they're so useful medicinally, and full of vitamins, minerals, and especially potassium!
and my guinea pig loves them
__________________
Anyone want to be friends on Facebook?
Send me your name via PM
My blog
Reply With Quote
  #24  
Old 04-20-2011, 02:51 AM
Derbylicious's Avatar
Derbylicious Derbylicious is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Victoria BC
Posts: 1,604
Default

I'm hooped, I'm useless at gardening

Back on topic though at the start of our journey *I* had a rule (I would say we but I don't really think my hubby was 100% on board with this one) I was ok with other women getting him off but he couldn't return the favour. I think I was trying to prevent the possibility of other women getting to attached to him. It's really embarassing that I used to think that way
__________________
Everything will be ok in the end. If it's not ok it's not the end.
Reply With Quote
  #25  
Old 04-20-2011, 02:56 AM
redpepper's Avatar
redpepper redpepper is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,632
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Derbylicious View Post
I think I was trying to prevent the possibility of other women getting to attached to him. It's really embarassing that I used to think that way
She might of gotten attached to the giving however..
__________________
Anyone want to be friends on Facebook?
Send me your name via PM
My blog
Reply With Quote
  #26  
Old 04-20-2011, 02:57 AM
Derbylicious's Avatar
Derbylicious Derbylicious is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Victoria BC
Posts: 1,604
Default

Yes, but it's an old rule...I'm very very over it now! There are bigger fish to fry than who is giving who orgasms or not
__________________
Everything will be ok in the end. If it's not ok it's not the end.
Reply With Quote
  #27  
Old 04-20-2011, 02:59 AM
redpepper's Avatar
redpepper redpepper is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,632
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Derbylicious View Post
Yes, but it's an old rule...I'm very very over it now! There are bigger fish to fry than who is giving who orgasms or not
Did you think of that at the time though? That sure is an interesting one... I am giggling at how that would play out. heh, awesome for hubby... or would it be. Thank goodness that is over with huh?!
__________________
Anyone want to be friends on Facebook?
Send me your name via PM
My blog
Reply With Quote
  #28  
Old 04-20-2011, 03:08 AM
Derbylicious's Avatar
Derbylicious Derbylicious is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Victoria BC
Posts: 1,604
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by redpepper View Post
Did you think of that at the time though? That sure is an interesting one... I am giggling at how that would play out. heh, awesome for hubby... or would it be. Thank goodness that is over with huh?!
I'm really not sure how in the heat of the moment that rule could have been followed!
__________________
Everything will be ok in the end. If it's not ok it's not the end.
Reply With Quote
  #29  
Old 04-20-2011, 03:12 AM
redpepper's Avatar
redpepper redpepper is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,632
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Derbylicious View Post
I'm really not sure how in the heat of the moment that rule could have been followed!
yeeeesss. I can see how that would be difficult... I guess he would just have to have his hands tied
__________________
Anyone want to be friends on Facebook?
Send me your name via PM
My blog
Reply With Quote
  #30  
Old 04-20-2011, 03:14 AM
Derbylicious's Avatar
Derbylicious Derbylicious is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Victoria BC
Posts: 1,604
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by redpepper View Post
yeeeesss. I can see how that would be difficult... I guess he would just have to have his hands tied
And a gag
__________________
Everything will be ok in the end. If it's not ok it's not the end.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
boundaries, communication, rules

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 11:40 AM.