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  #41  
Old 04-18-2011, 11:33 PM
TruckerPete TruckerPete is offline
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Originally Posted by Morningglory629 View Post
That's a given. And we have slowly been moving towards more social interaction. thanks Mon. How did you handle being introduced to Pepper's nuclear family? what helped? what didn't work for you? his dadt policy is that he does not want to hear sexual details. or for that matter personal details that concern only 2rings And I. but point taken.
Those personal details are hard to avoid. Whether it's laughing at a joke that you and OSO share and then having to fill in SO, or what have you. Spend any amount of time together, the three of you, and hubs won't be able to ignore the fact that you and 2rings are an item.
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  #42  
Old 04-19-2011, 01:34 AM
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LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
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Suggestions for keeping it general but thoughtful?
No,
but, what about starting a "blogger" or "wordpress" blog and you could get as personal as you want, you could invite by PM anyone on here that you were interested in sharing with or who has expressed an interest in knowing and it would still be....
out of the firing line....
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  #43  
Old 04-19-2011, 01:37 AM
NeonKaos NeonKaos is offline
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No,
but, what about starting a "blogger" or "wordpress" blog and you could get as personal as you want, you could invite by PM anyone on here that you were interested in sharing with or who has expressed an interest in knowing and it would still be....
out of the firing line....
This. A thousand times, this.
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  #44  
Old 04-19-2011, 01:40 AM
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LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
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The DADT policy is a difficult one to negotiate through AND have a relationship around each other.

GG is mono and he and I have a solid relationship.

You might drop him an email (if you want his email address PM me or catch me on facebook).

One of the difficulties I've encountered when having two loves in the same place is ensuring that both receive the amount of attention that they need-without the other one getting uppity.. I imagine that will be a topic to consider if you are with both your hubby and 2rings due to your hubby not wanting to encounter that aspect of yoru relationship with 2rings. You will have to "tone down" your affection with 2rings... that could cuase issues between the two of you.
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  #45  
Old 04-19-2011, 02:03 AM
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Morningglory629 Morningglory629 is offline
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Good suggestions all! wordpress? will have to look into that.
thanks for suggestions about Hubs and dadt too!
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  #46  
Old 04-19-2011, 02:35 AM
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SNeacail SNeacail is online now
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I find that my personal blog, which has very, very few viewers, helps me tremendously. Sometimes it's just a matter of being able to formulate and get my thoughts and rants down where I can read and re-read it as well as having those close to me see and comment on it if necessary. My husband nearly always reads it and it keeps him clued in as to where my thoughts are at, especially when we don't always have the time to sit down and have a serious discussion every night.
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  #47  
Old 04-19-2011, 04:58 AM
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Morningglory629 Morningglory629 is offline
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Originally Posted by SNeacail View Post
I find that my personal blog, which has very, very few viewers, helps me tremendously. Sometimes it's just a matter of being able to formulate and get my thoughts and rants down where I can read and re-read it as well as having those close to me see and comment on it if necessary. My husband nearly always reads it and it keeps him clued in as to where my thoughts are at, especially when we don't always have the time to sit down and have a serious discussion every night.
Yes this is an interesting option. I am having a hard time wrapping my head around how to balance peace with everyone in our situation AND either not communicating or communicating too much. So what is TMI in a poly/mono double hinge situation?
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  #48  
Old 04-19-2011, 05:51 AM
Hannahfluke Hannahfluke is offline
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Originally Posted by Morningglory629 View Post
Yes this is an interesting option. I am having a hard time wrapping my head around how to balance peace with everyone in our situation AND either not communicating or communicating too much. So what is TMI in a poly/mono double hinge situation?
I don't know that it's even a poly/mono thing, I think it is totally person specific. For instance, my husband and I are both poly. My husband is a voyeur and is way more comfortable hearing information about my physical relationships with other people then I am of hearing about his physical relationships with other people. In terms of hearing about relationship information, even inside jokes, etc., both of us have about the same tolerance. But our point of TMI for physical information is way different.
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  #49  
Old 04-19-2011, 06:17 AM
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Morningglory629 Morningglory629 is offline
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I don't know that it's even a poly/mono thing, I think it is totally person specific. For instance, my husband and I are both poly. My husband is a voyeur and is way more comfortable hearing information about my physical relationships with other people then I am of hearing about his physical relationships with other people. In terms of hearing about relationship information, even inside jokes, etc., both of us have about the same tolerance. But our point of TMI for physical information is way different.
Good point. It is definitely a "feel your way" kind of thing; which sucks for me because I am a COA (course of action) kind of person. BTW I am definitely much more a voyuer, but have a really hard time sharing my personal stuff. 2Rings is really the only person that knows all of my "stuff" because he was so into listening and helping me work through some things- I have mighty struggles with trust. So that is why I have no idea what is TMI- I think everything is TMI but at the same time really like to hear/watch both the sexual and personal stuff of others. Is it duplicity? Is it empathy? Is it some kind of courtship disorder? No idea. But I can say this blogging thing is soooo out of my comfort zone. I can't believe I am doing it. It is addicting and freeing to a point. Thank God it is somewhat anonymous. I am a walking contradiction, this I know!
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  #50  
Old 04-19-2011, 03:44 PM
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Morningglory629 Morningglory629 is offline
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Default Just a blurb I read on sexual liberation etc

"The societal and cultural reality is that we are a far cry from sexual equality in this day and age. Men, straight or gay, have benefited from the luxury of sexual liberation without so much as their moral values being scrutinized by society. Women, whether straight or queer, have no such freedom. Labels such as “slut” or “nympho” continue to plague women who seek sexual autonomy. These stereotypes and misconceptions are perpetuated in the media, government, educational system, religious institutions, and even within the women’s movement. We still have a long way to go before we can dismantle these derogatory perceptions and liberate ourselves from the social constraints that have been imposed upon us since birth. The first place to start is with one’s self, confronting your own self-imposed guilt and your fears of stepping outside the standards of societal norms. It starts with freeing your mind, body, and heart to love openly despite judgment."
Wendy-O Matik

I think a reclaiming of the word slut (which I know there is a thread on here) is in order Not everyone will ever read the book Ethical Slut.
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