Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > Poly Relationships Corner

Notices

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #11  
Old 04-08-2011, 03:57 AM
nycindie's Avatar
nycindie nycindie is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Big Apple
Posts: 7,414
Default

Have you spoken to Ladybug about these transgressions? Just wondering if that might be useful, or for all of you to discuss things together.
__________________
The world opens up... when you do.

"Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me." ~Bryan Ferry
"Love and the self are one . . ." ~Leo Buscaglia "

An excellent blog post against hierarchy in polyamory: http://solopoly.net/2014/10/31/why-i...short-version/
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 04-08-2011, 04:00 AM
habitat habitat is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 20
Default

Indie, I'm would love to discuss things all together, but if it happens, it will have to happen after the "break". We shall see.

By the by, the break is for all of us. Pretty will not see either I nor Ladybug during this time.
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Old 04-08-2011, 09:33 AM
BlackUnicorn's Avatar
BlackUnicorn BlackUnicorn is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 906
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by habitat View Post
The point is moot, however. The night after I wrote it, I called him and told him that we needed space, and that I would send the email, but I never did. I needed to talk in person. The next day, we talked and he said he needed space to figure stuff out for himself. He's torn because he loves both of us. I need to be stabilized again and feel respected, so I suggested that we be exclusive for a while, until we work things out, and then open our relationship back up. He's unable to commit to leaving her (I really don't blame him for that, it's just that we're not getting anywhere in this V) and is overwhelmed with the intensely emotional repercussions of his actions. I feel terribly threatened that he could leave me for her. It's definitely a possibility. Perhaps a probability.
So sorry to hear, lots of hugs coming your way now.

I have no moral objections to most forms of non-monogamy, and certainly none to serial monogamists. Perhaps at this point in his life Pretty is not able to handle the emotions balancing between ORE/NRE causes, and his love for Ladybug is taking away from his love for you. If he is a serial monogamist at heart, leaving you 'for' Ladybug has nothing to do with you but simply means you got to him first.

I don't know if this helped or caused more fervent cleaning activity, but I guess it's good either way ?
__________________
Me: bi female in my twenties
Dating: Moonlightrunner
Metamour: Windflower
Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
communication, nvc

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 07:22 AM.