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Old 04-03-2011, 01:32 AM
kingofmice kingofmice is offline
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Default An article I found

Now, I'm sure most of you have read/encountered this. It's two years old, and it's the first news-related item that pops up when you Google "polyamory." I bring it up because towards the end there's a quote from a professor at Rutgers that insists it's against human biology to engage in polyamory. Now, I'm neither a biochemist nor a psychologist, but I am a writer, and thus consider myself both highly intuitive and empathetic. I can see the logic behind polyamory. For one, there's the increase in solidarity amongst the members committed to the relationship. And doesn't it just seem illogical to assume one human can fulfill all your needs?

Does anyone know of any other articles that deal with this issue? Or understand more about the chemistry? Just curious.

Also! Here's the quote: "Polyamory might sound like heaven to some: a variety of partners, adding spice and a respite from the familiarity and boredom that's doomed many a traditional couple. But humans are hard-wired to be jealous, and though it may be possible to overcome it, polyamorous couples are "fighting Mother Nature" when they try, says biological anthropologist Helen Fisher, a professor at Rutgers University who has long studied the chemistry of love."

And the link: http://www.newsweek.com/2009/07/28/o...u-and-you.html
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Old 04-03-2011, 02:43 AM
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"Polyamory might sound like heaven to some: a variety of partners, adding spice and a respite from the familiarity and boredom that's doomed many a traditional couple. But humans are hard-wired to be jealous, and though it may be possible to overcome it, polyamorous couples are "fighting Mother Nature" when they try, says biological anthropologist Helen Fisher, a professor at Rutgers University who has long studied the chemistry of love. Polys say they aren't so much denying their biological instincts as insisting they can work around them—through open communication, patience, and honesty. "

WOW! I have communicated with her through PM a while ago. I posted those e-mails on another thread, I guess she is doing more research!

Not saying she is right. There's a few errors in the article, especially when the word poly was coined.
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Old 04-03-2011, 03:00 PM
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Hmm, I guess jealousy comes in degrees like any other human trait.
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Old 04-03-2011, 08:47 PM
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Of course, Fisher pooh-poohs polyamory; she's protecting her bottom line. Dr. Helen Fisher helped develop Chemistry.com, a dating site, and is still very much involved in it. I am sure she makes a lot of money from Chemistry.com. The site is very focused on encouraging its members to believe in the dream of finding "The One."

Acknowledging that polyamory can work wouldn't help her profits much when Chemistry.com holds out that golden apple of finding happiness ever after with the one and only prince or princess of your dreams!
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Old 04-03-2011, 11:27 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nycindie View Post
Of course, Fisher pooh-poohs polyamory; she's protecting her bottom line.
She actually expressed admiration about people who are poly and can actually have healthy multiple relations to me. She's not anti poly but recognizes that it is very few people who can pull it off in a healthy way.
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Old 04-03-2011, 11:33 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MonoVCPHG View Post
She actually expressed admiration about people who are poly and can actually have healthy multiple relations to me. She's not anti poly but recognizes that it is very few people who can pull it off in a healthy way.
I admit, I shot my mouth off without having read the article. I'm usually skeptical when I think there could be an ulterior motive. And, while it may be true that few people can do poly in a healthy way, I would say that few people seem to be able to do any kind of relationship in a healthy way, LOL. But she does have a financial interest in promoting monogamy and the idea of finding The One.
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Old 04-03-2011, 11:48 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nycindie View Post
while it may be true that few people can do poly in a healthy way, I would say that few people seem to be able to do any kind of relationship in a healthy way, LOL. .
I agree totally
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