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Old 03-24-2011, 10:56 PM
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SNeacail SNeacail is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Near Disneyland
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Originally Posted by mrspolycurious View Post
I don't know who my parents swapped me with but I have never felt part around here!
LOL! My brother and I are asking ourselves the same question. He an I have, independently come to very similar ideas on stuff and it is quite contrary how our parents think they raised us, especially on religous stuff. In their world, there is just no room to disagree with their views.

I think there was a question about does he love me or control...Ask my friends they would say...very loudly...CONTROL..but I know he thinks he loves me but he is very controlling. I don't think he values me as a person. he compliments my mothering and wifey skills and he does still find me attractive, but I wonder if its not just easier than having to get out there at our age and start over!

I wish I could talk to him and he wouldn't get mad and sulk around for a couple of days. I usually do keep my wants inside and I guess they come out in dreams and my writing.
Is your friends opinions based on first hand observations or from listening to you complain? Sometimes we are too close to a situation to view it for what it really is.

It's not all that unusual for a guy to need to process stuff on his own for a few days. I do think you are doing both of you a diservice by keeping everything inside. Maybe with the help of a marriage councelor (non-church affiliated) you can make some progress in your communications. My husband would dismiss things I was trying to say prior to us going to therapy, but she was able to get through to him that I had a legitimate issue that needed to be addressed. Even if you don't stay together, if you think he isn't showing you respect, I would strongly suggest therapy, because your kids will treat you exactly how they see their dad treating you.

Have you had him read any of your writing? That may be a place to start and tell him that those are some of the things you fantasize about.

I totally find the idea of the MM in the MFM relationship exciting and sweet at the same time.
HEHE! I feel the same, but realize, based on conversations I have had with my husband, for the most part totally unrealistic.

Last edited by SNeacail; 03-24-2011 at 11:03 PM.
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