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Old 03-11-2011, 12:25 AM
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redpepper redpepper is offline
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Originally Posted by Freetime View Post
2) Distance and emotional dishonesty on my part kept me willfully ignorant of what was happening. Ok that's not true I could see and feel the spiritual distance but didn't know what to do to address it. I've lived a very small life in the last couple of years because of a Back injury, but mostly because of my uneasiness with how things stood between us. This has only made the low level dissatisfaction worse for her, for us.


4) ........ My lack of direction and living in fear of loss or failure have created this perfect storm moment. When we met I was a free spirit, afraid of nothing and willing to try just about anything, but over the years I have become.......lost and forgotten with little Idea of how to get that man back. My wife simply wants that feeling and opportunity again, as any of us would. so the least that I can do to try to end this on a high note for her. I hope her date tonight rocks her world, but I have no illusions as to the final outcome. Her "date" is what I used to be, only younger and still building an interesting life.
You've got some work to do... start talking. Tell her just what you said here... you have been scared, don't know how to approach your disconnect... all that... remember, she loved who you were when you met and loves who you have become. This man is a representation of what you were, but you are a lovable result of who you once were. That is cherished by her. Talk to her! Before she goes out!
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Tags
acceptance, communication, dating, jealousy, marriage vs. polyamory, metamours, struggling, transition

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