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  #21  
Old 02-19-2011, 05:15 PM
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LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
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That's hysterical in a horrible way sneacail.

A week ago our argument was over the word "talk". Look it up in the dictionary-etc. Same basic theme as you describe. (rolling eyes at self).

Why? I try very, very hard to ensure that I actually understand what people are trying to convey to me and when things are vague or words misused.... I don't understand, that leaves me feeling lost, confused and insecure.
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  #22  
Old 02-20-2011, 10:18 PM
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I'm f'ing with my computer today, getting ready to go get a new washer (old one broke).
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  #23  
Old 02-21-2011, 01:00 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by redpepper View Post
Rarechild, I love the delicateness of your words here. My words seem clumpsy and awkward next to yours sometimes.

I think I need to read this thread again or something because as much as I love your words. I don't have any clue what they mean LOL could you give me more to go on... cause I want to.
I've been meaning to translate this post, just now getting to it. I love your compliment, along with telling me I make no sense. I have a problem speaking plain English sometimes, and am blessed that the people I write most often to are accustomed to my way- at least I think they are. Here, lemme try my best:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rarechild View Post
On rebuilding trust:
Redpepper, I love the way you value yourself.

I have pushed full force past boundaries, even barricades, but I have paid attention each time. I feel like I'm building the skill of forgiving myself my humanity, as long as I don't allow myself to become a monster. This is the best thing I can do to build trust with my intimates, whether it has been broken, healed, or only dreamed about.-R
Translates: I have made lots of mistakes due to impulsiveness, impatience, selfishness, effusiveness, etc., but I have learned from them actively. I accept that I will fail and make mistakes and I am not afraid of it, I value it. The only thing that does not deserve my self-forgiveness is when I continue along a path I know is hurtful to myself or others (monster). Loving and forgiving myself builds trust more than anything else, I find, because I must trust myself to be trusted.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rarechild View Post
I work on trusting myself, so my so my decisions are authentic and kind. I trust that if I work, they will love me for who I am, love my flaws like they are shining diamonds, because each is a precious opportunity to carefully keep from falling, and delight in, much like RP said.

There is a safe place in my heart where it is impossible to tell lies. I made it for myself. I invite them in.

-R
I hope the last part makes more sense with the above translation. I really would be very interested to know if it does not, because I truly want to recognize how I am being unclear, and how I can work on that.

-R
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compassion, fear, forgiveness, healing, introspection, lies, rebuilding trust, self-responsibility, trust

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