Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > Poly Relationships Corner

Notices

 
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Prev Previous Post   Next Post Next
  #1  
Old 02-17-2011, 08:12 PM
BlackUnicorn's Avatar
BlackUnicorn BlackUnicorn is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 906
Default Balance btw Knowing Your Needs and Letting Things Evolve Naturally

I realize this just might be one of those questions where the answer will always be 'it varies from one person to the next', but I'll ask anyway;

I've been reading a lot of how important it is to not get obsessed over a particular relationship form you want to have, such as 'It must be a triad or a vee, otherwise I'm not interested'. I accept this as a totally valid point. However, there seems also to be a lot of emphasis on figuring what your needs in a relationship, ANY relationship, are.

So how to strike a balance between what to me seem at first potentially incompatible goals? If obsessing over a particular relationship formation you think you need is setting yourself up for frustration, can you have expectations about the type of people you're seeking to bond with?

1) Is deciding, for example, that you want your ideal relationship to include at least one woman, too restrictive?
2) How about being relatively certain that a particular relating style, such as BDSM, holds no appeal to you?

I'm assuming for this example that the person figuring this out has some experience with both male-partners-only and BDSM to base that decision on.

So - no expectations or as few as you can live with?
Reply With Quote
 

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 08:10 PM.