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  #11  
Old 01-15-2011, 07:45 PM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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Originally Posted by thesavageprincess View Post
She wants to leave. She does not want to continue a relationship after she has moved.
Hmm, that wasn't clear before. And it still not clear to me now, sorry. So, she doesn't want to continue with either of you after moving out? Then why did you ask if it's okay for you to insist they not have sex without you? Who wants to have sex together without you?

"Sharing your man with another" -- are you poly or not? It doesn't always have to be a live-in arrangement. Why can't both you and your fiance have other relationships? Or is that you are more into swinging than polyamory? It still sounds to me like you treated her like a toy.

Am I missing something?
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Last edited by nycindie; 01-15-2011 at 07:51 PM.
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  #12  
Old 01-15-2011, 07:51 PM
NeonKaos NeonKaos is offline
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Originally Posted by thesavageprincess View Post
She wants to leave. She does not want to continue a relationship after she has moved. She wants out. She does not want to have to share her significant other with another woman. So y would I continue on wanting to share my man with her.
If she wants to break up and they're breaking up, then why would they BE having sex? She wants out, you just SAID so. Why are you so fixated on "sharing your man with her"? You seem to be talking out of both sides of your mouth.
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  #13  
Old 01-15-2011, 07:53 PM
thesavageprincess thesavageprincess is offline
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Thanks for the threads, I bookmarked them so when I work tonight I have something to keep my mind off the fact they will be alone together and quite possibly most likely be having sex. I hope this is not the case. And no this isn't just about sex. And yes he loves her which is making this all so hard. Today they were cuddling on the floor in the living room and I got upset. He told me to calm down. Wtf. Idk but if you were any type of good man you would stand behind your future wife and be asking all sorts of questions and wanting a discussion on where to take the next step. I'm in limbo and have no idea what to say.
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  #14  
Old 01-15-2011, 07:57 PM
NeonKaos NeonKaos is offline
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Originally Posted by thesavageprincess View Post
Thanks for the threads, I bookmarked them so when I work tonight I have something to keep my mind off the fact they will be alone together and quite possibly most likely be having sex. I hope this is not the case. And no this isn't just about sex. And yes he loves her which is making this all so hard. Today they were cuddling on the floor in the living room and I got upset. He told me to calm down. Wtf. Idk but if you were any type of good man you would stand behind your future wife and be asking all sorts of questions and wanting a discussion on where to take the next step. I'm in limbo and have no idea what to say.
So are they breaking up or aren't they? You say "she wants out". Obviously her actions say otherwise.

This is fucked up and I'm not sure what to make of it, so far.

It would be super-grooovy if the other two people were here to give their sides of the story because something doesn't jibe.
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  #15  
Old 01-15-2011, 07:57 PM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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. . . they will be alone together and quite possibly most likely be having sex. I hope this is not the case.
But I thought she broke it off and left. ???? None of this makes sense.
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  #16  
Old 01-15-2011, 07:58 PM
NeonKaos NeonKaos is offline
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???? None of this makes sense.
So it isn't just me who noticed that.
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  #17  
Old 01-15-2011, 08:00 PM
thesavageprincess thesavageprincess is offline
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We want a triad, okay. And we don't want to be open in him dating one woman and I other I'm not comfortable with that. I want to be there when I'm future husband is touching another woman... That's what I wanted in the first place... THIS IS NOT WHAT SHE WANTS.
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  #18  
Old 01-15-2011, 08:03 PM
thesavageprincess thesavageprincess is offline
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We all live together, she has not left yet and I don't know when she will be. No one elts seems to want to talk about it but me
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  #19  
Old 01-15-2011, 08:05 PM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thesavageprincess View Post
We want a triad, okay. And we don't want to be open in him dating one woman and I other I'm not comfortable with that. I want to be there when I'm future husband is touching another woman... That's what I wanted in the first place... THIS IS NOT WHAT SHE WANTS.
Well apparently, you didn't want it with her, either. Your first post stated that he moved her in without asking you first. Then you stated:
Quote:
Originally Posted by thesavageprincess View Post
I was not attracted to her.
Perhaps your fiance fell in love with her, but it seems that you expected her to be your sex toy, even though you were not attracted to her and she was not attracted to you. Now you're mad at them. Why did you go along with it? Obviously, your fiance has problems respecting you and communicating with you, but you are also being a bit unrealistic. If you do a search for "triad" here, you will read lots about how they work. The people involved do not always feel the same way toward each other, and it seems difficult -- or impossible -- to expect that.
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Last edited by nycindie; 01-15-2011 at 08:19 PM.
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  #20  
Old 01-15-2011, 08:18 PM
thesavageprincess thesavageprincess is offline
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Unhappy

Like I said mistakes were made. And I not wanting to hurt anyone left it alone. I grew to like her and care for her. But after she tells me she doesn't feel the same I don't know what to think. A few months pass, I'm getting sexually aggravated, me and john have been having less sex with each other. We all share a bed so it virtually impossible to get some action when the other is not in the mood. She has never been able to get turned on around me. Which is fine I'm not pissed about that. I just never had this problem with my past lovers. We all got along, loved having sex, never judged, and I miss that. I never had to struggle so much with one person. To get her to talk about issues about our relationship is like pulling teeth.
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break up, break-ups, communication skills, hurt, living together, mistakes, moving, moving in, moving in together, sex, triad, unicorn

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