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  #111  
Old 12-26-2010, 07:14 AM
booklady78 booklady78 is offline
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I'm trying hard to be thankful for the wonderful Christmas Eve I had with my husband, his girlfriend, and my boyfriend. It's hard though, accepting that my father has been ignoring me for a couple of months now. He's cut me out entirely. He refuses to have any discussions and has ignored letters I've sent.
Coming out to everyone else has been manageable, but not him. I don't even get the opportunity to find out what the hell he's so concerned about because he says the topic isn't open for discussion. I'm refusing to carry on as if nothing is wrong and omit the mere mention of people I care about. I'm not ashamed and I was getting tired of hiding it from him after I told him.

I don't know how long I'm supposed to wait for him to come around. I don't know how much harder I'm supposed to try.
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  #112  
Old 12-26-2010, 03:59 PM
TruckerPete TruckerPete is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by booklady78 View Post
I'm trying hard to be thankful for the wonderful Christmas Eve I had with my husband, his girlfriend, and my boyfriend. It's hard though, accepting that my father has been ignoring me for a couple of months now. He's cut me out entirely. He refuses to have any discussions and has ignored letters I've sent.
Coming out to everyone else has been manageable, but not him. I don't even get the opportunity to find out what the hell he's so concerned about because he says the topic isn't open for discussion. I'm refusing to carry on as if nothing is wrong and omit the mere mention of people I care about. I'm not ashamed and I was getting tired of hiding it from him after I told him.

I don't know how long I'm supposed to wait for him to come around. I don't know how much harder I'm supposed to try.
Oh BL, I'm so sorry to hear this. I'd be heartbroken if that happened. (((HUG)))
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  #113  
Old 12-26-2010, 05:35 PM
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redpepper redpepper is offline
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Booklady I feel for you. It's tough isn't it. I remember what it was like to not have my family talking with me. It was hard to know if I should ignore it and just be myself and carry on, business as usual, which would be hard or suck it up and pretend nothing is going on and hide it from them again to protect them. I did the latter to begin with and it go so hard lying again and I felt like an idiot because they already knew so why lie. I ended up just carrying on and being honest and myself. This was what turned them around as much as their decision to accept.
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  #114  
Old 12-27-2010, 05:04 AM
booklady78 booklady78 is offline
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Thanks TruckerPete and Redpepper
I had no idea where this journey was going to take me, this is a hard path right now but I can get through it. Knowing that I'm not the first person to deal with difficult family gives me hope that they are going to come around.
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  #115  
Old 12-27-2010, 03:22 PM
TruckerPete TruckerPete is offline
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Originally Posted by booklady78 View Post
Thanks TruckerPete and Redpepper
I had no idea where this journey was going to take me, this is a hard path right now but I can get through it. Knowing that I'm not the first person to deal with difficult family gives me hope that they are going to come around.
PM me if there's anything I can do. I'm a good listener.
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  #116  
Old 12-29-2010, 07:38 AM
preciselove preciselove is offline
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We've recently come out to some family, mostly because we now have somewhat a successful triad going. Personally I don't care what they think, they can either accept it and still have me communicate to them or not and it stops. I'm rather independent from my family due to moving away from them all to another state, basically starting out anew with my own family.

Of course to MY family having 2 women in my life isn't exactly that negative a thing, and they just generally accept it like "oh haha you're a mormon now". My 1st girlfriend has more issues to contend with because her family generally think I'm weird and she's a woman being controlled if theres another woman in our relationship. However if your family still thinks you're going to be supported, give them grandchildren/cousins/etc then what do they really have to be upset about?

Triads/Quads will be part of the standards in regards to relationships in the future in my mind, most people already seem to accept it on some level.
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  #117  
Old 12-29-2010, 06:38 PM
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RfromRMC RfromRMC is offline
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Been "out" as gay to most of my family for aprox 15 years. For the past 2 and a half, everyone has known me to be in a couple with M. Only our gay friends knew we were a triad, plus a few poly people we met locally here and there. Our gay friends have reacted mostly supportive, though there are a few who seem bitter (that whole "i can't even get ONE man let alone two!!" )

When C moved in, it was the "couple with best friend living in" thing to my family. (Though M told his family pretty early...brave boy!)
I'll tell you from experience, the couple-plus-best-friend-roomie won't last long...people will begin to figure it out.

Boom...Christmas Day...Mom goes "so what is really going on? This isn't some kinky Mormon thing you got going is it?!?"


My appetite for Christmas dinner has never been so low. I just had to stress the word LOVE over and over. Try to get her mind away from sex or anything like that. It's about love, mom...that's all you need to know.

Sigh.

Haven't had another discussion about it yet, but that was only 5 days ago. So we'll see.
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  #118  
Old 12-29-2010, 06:44 PM
NeonKaos NeonKaos is offline
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You should have answered "Yes, Mom, it's kinky; but it ain't Mormon!"
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  #119  
Old 12-29-2010, 07:59 PM
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MindfulAgony MindfulAgony is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NeonKaos View Post
You should have answered "Yes, Mom, it's kinky; but it ain't Mormon!"
Lol. Good one.
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  #120  
Old 01-02-2011, 04:43 PM
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RfromRMC RfromRMC is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NeonKaos View Post
You should have answered "Yes, Mom, it's kinky; but it ain't Mormon!"
Um....no. She's got enough health issues without me giving her a heart-attack.

Been over a week now. Still no further discussion. Maybe she's gonna pretend it never happened. Ah...mothers!
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