Originally Posted by NeonKaos
I hate to say this, but it does not sound like your marriage is ready for poly.
The prevailing wisdom is that a relationship must be strong and healthy in order for either partner to become involved with someone else, otherwise the existing problems will get worse and not better.
You and your husband need to work things out within your OWN relationship before EITHER of you can be in another.
It sounds like swinging was working alright for the both of you. Is there some reason you can't simply go back to "just sex" with other partners?
deep sigh... I doubt my husband will ever be ready. truthfully. Our relationship is good.. it's the husband that's not. B just has to many issues... and this makes me so very sad.. because I would never want to have J as a primary. I would never want to be mono with J... I could easily be Mono with B... but he opened this can of worms and let me explore and now he wants to snap the lid shut and hell yeah I'm MAD.
we had a swing party last weekend... and he realized he no longer likes that either... so just sex with others won't work.... and truthfully I always needed a connection to folks so I was never a very good swinger...
sadly there is no fixing of B. He won't do the work.