Disclaimer - I realize that neither D nor S are here to give their sides of the story. I am working with the information that is available. If additional information becomes available, I am prepared to revise my opinions/judgments. The preceding was directed at the oppression-and-marginalization-gestapo who are reading this and discussing it elsewhere. You know who you are.
Originally Posted by Seekinganswer
But what does S think? This is one is tricky, he has repeatedly said that he would like us to really try to enjoy without the pressure of the future talk. He in fact promised D that if she trusts him, she will be really happy!! Hmm.. note that he does not clearly state that there will be no babies, or traditional marriage or living together. To me this sounds like a silent promise and very very dangerous.
And D? I know from past discussions with her that S promised her countless times that she will have a "happy life". She has interpreted this before as an affirmation that he will give her what she wants (babies and living with her) I tested the waters and asked her directly if she is still hoping for the babies with S. She says,"I do not want to focus on that now", lets all just be happy. Vagueness again.
Basically, it looks to me like D and/or S think that you can be convinced to change your mind about this. If S refuses to come right out and say to D "There is no chance we will ever live together or have children together. Do you understand? Please tell me what you think I just said means," then he is harboring a pipe-dream that you will eventually "come around" and see things differently.