My experience wiht this poly-crap!!!
i'm 57 now. And living alone.
I introduced her to the idea of poly, though I knew little of it myself, back in `01. I thought it was another name for a line marriage.
One could say this was a male midlife thing; maybe it was.
I had recently lost the best homebased biz on could ask for; all cash and carry, a few specialized vehicles for the work, and happily getting up and going out before the alarm went off at 2 AM.
i was indeed happy with my work for the first time in my life.
Then it crashed and burned totally after 9-11.
I had totally collapsed and had no desire to go back to the useless widget jobs that paid less than living wage. I did go into one of the deepest depressions I had ever been in for almost a year.
I met her in a certain group on AOL, and was in that group trying to talk a kid of 14 out of suicide when I was hardly better off myself. I was trying to remember a line from a certain song when she chimed in and finished the line; a pagan song.
We chatted afterwards for months. She finally suggested we get together, i did refuse for a while, then finally gave in. I had been weary, and my homelife was to say the least, one of sorrow and grief for a few decades. I wanted better.
I did introduce the concept-word "Polyamory" to her. She took to it like a fish in water. My big mistake!!
To make a very long story short; i left my wife of 20-odd years, we moved in together, she, the other woman, sat on her can for 5 years, we had a child, I worked, she sat in front of the computer most of the time...
... and after five years i weakened and went crazy again, doing crap i hated to keep the family together. I never got back into business again, and after five years and a move, I physically and emotionally collapsed yet again!!
She finally got off her ass and said ( quite clearly showing me her true meaning) "i'm gonna get a job!!";meaning she as gonna find a job and get a boyfriend; which she did the first week after she got her factory job.
...and she eventually did go having sex with him, but calling it polyamory is the wrong thing; in doing him she ignored me and our son!!
Did i mentiom I was loosing body parts at the time?? First toes, then leg, then the other leg... and so on. And ijnfections for 2 1/2 years; and from the time she started having her little 20-something yr old fuck-buddy that she called her polyamory "love" she refused to let me touch her... for four years.
Six months afterward that strated she forbid me to ever touch her again!!!
She has slapped me, beat me with a stick, and kicked me constantly, and says it never happened; she claims now that she never forbid me to touch her; and she now claims I could have had her any time I wanted; which also is a lie. She forbade me.
Not to mention she has beaten our son more and more since she started all this "poly-crap!", and no one will help me, not even the courts.
Now i'm alone, living in a small community in Tennessee. far better than some big city with all it's bullshit lifestyles. (I've seen what you're really like; you whore yourselves to the "jobs" for meaningless existances). J.O.B.: Just Over Broke. Been there, done that. you'll never make life better for anyone because you haven't a clue to the meaning of life. The high population cities are the worst thing in ongoing human history. (sorry; off my soapbox now)
All that matters to her is her fuckbuddies her girlfriend fucklbuddies, and her lies. Not me, nor our son, nor anything beyound her lies matters.
This relationship of lies lasted nine years, four of it her forbidding me to touch her, and me loosing legs and dealing with a massive total body infection, which she had no real concern over.
When I did tell this to an old guru of the polyamory thing he did agree with me; it was not poly, and I had been wronged.
He's a friend of her new poly-fuck-buddy, whom i truely do feel sorry for, having recently met him. HYe is a younger polyamory new age guru who got dissed by his wife and lost her. Now he goes round the country to all his women; his "poly-wives" while his main "wife" at home does her bi-thing. or whatever.
Did I mention i had a Heinlein book-burning??
I took all his line family and polyamory books and burned them this fall; books I had cherished for decades, including several old hardbacks of "Stranger...", "Time Enough For Love", "Number of the Beast", and let's not forget "The Moon is A Harsh Mistress"; his idea of the evolution of hippie commumnes.
I'm wondering if anyone ever noticed a certain thing about his idea of that Lunar Line Marriage: the family members would be perfectly at home in a Right Wing Republican party convention, or even a Tea Party Convention.
I no longer hope for "love" in any form of fashion; not from a woman; "love" indeed is a lie.
My children love me, and that is all love really is.
It turns out we men are just being lied to about love by the women; love is the excuse all women give for their own lusts and desires. May as well keep coming up with good pickup lines guys; we're just being bullshitted by the fems who know nothing of love, 'cept loving themselves, like the old song says.
Not even for a child.