Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > Life stories and blogs


Thread Tools Display Modes
Prev Previous Post   Next Post Next
Old 12-03-2010, 11:05 PM
marksbabygirl marksbabygirl is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Squamish, BC
Posts: 790
Default Something More

Something More

The past 4 months have been an incredibly gut-wrenching, painful journey for me. There are fractures in what I thought was a solid, un-breakable marriage. My sex drive is at an all time low.

I've learned some things though.

I've learned that I have a LOT of work to do on myself. The idea that my husband can love someone else terrifies me to the core. I know where that fear comes from - and the work to overcome that fear is going to be immense - it stems from my early childhood, reinforced by various situations and people right up to and including my husband's actions recently.

I am fascinated by what I am reading on the facebook group. The ideas about non-violent communication, scarcity vs abundance, how to be a wholehearted person, the processes of learning to own your feelings and being responsible for them ... hmmm now that I think about it - its mostly stuff RP posts. It all challenges me to think, to re-evaluate who I am and what I believe.

I keep reading even though it causes me anxiety. I have learned that those things that cause me anxiety are issues I need to work on.

I don't know where we'll go in terms of other relationships... and right now - I don't want a direction. I choose to stay around the poly forums because I find the information here invaluable for my own personal growth.
Some believe in destiny, and some believe in fate
I believe that happiness is something we create

My Journey to Health and Fitness
My Journey as a Widow

Reply With Quote

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

All times are GMT. The time now is 03:12 PM.