The Downside of Poly: Article in Psychology Today

[eskimo]

I loved the article, but more wanted to comment on Ready2Flys quote that Mono has a problem with.

I like Ready2Flys quote, I found it a great way to explain why polyamoury feels natural to me (I liked it so much I put it on my blog).

I don't think that just because something is natural for humans, that every human needs to feel it. There's nothing un-natural, or in-human about hunting, but many people don't feel the desire to do that. It doesn't make it unnatural just because not everyone feels it.

I believe that both Polyamory and Monogomy are natural, in the same way that both heterosexual desires and homosexual desires are natural. Sometimes a person will have one set of desires, sometimes another, sometimes both, but they're still all natural human tendancies.

[MonoVCPHG]

Originally Posted by eskimo

I believe that both Polyamory and Monogomy are natural, in the same way that both heterosexual desires and homosexual desires are natural. .

I believe they are natural as well I just don't think that all humans naturally wander. Nothing major

[Ready2Fly]

I'd just add, by the way, that the article's claim that an openly poly person cannot be a politician is falsified by example. In 1998, Colorado Governor Roy Romer was caught in what reporters believed was an illicit affair. To their astonishment (and probably disappointment), however, he revealed that his wife had known of and accepted the relationship all along--- all 16 years of it. It was his and his wife's openness about it that defused the scandal. Romer continued in office as governor, and then moved to LA where he served as superintendent of the LA Unified School District until 2006.

[River]

Thanks, Ready2Fly, for bringing this bit of poly history to our awareness! I bet there are other examples, too.

[Tonberry]

Originally Posted by River

Thanks, Ready2Fly, for bringing this bit of poly history to our awareness! I bet there are other examples, too.

François Miterrand (French President) had a second partner and a daughter with her, they lived very close, he saw them pretty much every day and Miterrand's wife was aware of everything (although it seems it started out as an affair. It's hard to be sure as things like that can be presented as affairs even when they aren't). They were together from the 60s to his death in 96 (he met his legal wife in the 40s I believe).

He hid his second family from the public until 94, but his friends knew, as well as a bunch of journalists. (It has changed a bit since, but at the time France was of the opinion that politicians' private lives were nobody's business, so it's not something they felt they should publish, until Miterrand himself said so). The second family actually had protection with bodyguards and the like, just like the first one.

When it was revealed, I wouldn't say it was much of a scandal. I was pretty young but I've only ever remembered it mentioned as a matter of fact. I think it can be received either way, as worse than an affair or as a non-issue, it probably depends a lot on the context.