I am heartbroken!
OK, so my first attempt at poly was not a success.
Please read my previous post...
Although I never cheated and was honest from the start, this attempt went nowhere.
My approach may have been blunt and brutal but given the circumstances, I could not see any other options to get my message out.
We had a tumultuous period at that time and did my best.
I thought my SO would be open but she is clearly in total fear of losing me at this point.
I am sure she will finally understand at some point since we are very open minded in general but in the meantime...
She says she does not want an open couple...I don't either. I only want Miss 2nd in my life. She can also have someone special in hers if she wants. Is this coherent??
The lies and deceit of Miss 2nd are not that bad considering that we played with her feelings and her head.
Yes she is maried but it is a consensual agreement.
My SO was OK with the idea in the beginning but backed off very quickly making everybody really pissed.
She does talk every now and then of allowing me to meet with Miss 2nd eventually but pospones it indefinitely when she realizes I am really feelling for Miss 2nd. This is making me nuts.
This has been the case from the very beginning.
I have broken all forms of communication with Miss2nd and am following the guidelines this time. We left it off on a very bad note. Miss 2nd is perhaps hating me and never wanting to talk to me ever.
I am just heartbroken. I am not a sexual predator and only wanted Miss 2nd in my life, nothing else.
Every day, I can only think of the loss.
I still love (and live with) my SO so I can say I am lucky I guess.
Last edited by yul; 11-17-2010 at 04:01 PM.