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Old 08-19-2009, 10:09 PM
frudgens frudgens is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 2
Default work crush

hello everyone! i just joined and would love your opinions.

so. my boyfriend and i have been together for 2.5 years and we are both in love with each other, and extremely secure in our relationship. polyamory has become a recent topic of conversation (brought up by me), and he has said he is open to it and wants me to be happy. i'm not sure he's as into the idea as i am, but our communication has been fantastic.

meanwhile, i've had a crush on a guy i work with for 8 months. it's an intense crush -- i've had others but they usually only last a month or two. i know the crush is mutual, and I have definite romantic feelings for him at this point.

my questions are:

1. i've admitted to my boyfriend that i'm attracted to other people, but i've never said it specifically about my work crush. how do i bring this up in a way that is sensitive AND to the point? should i tell him who it is? should i remain vague? what are your thoughts on discretion, and what's the best way to negotiate ground rules?

2. assuming my boyfriend agrees that my specific polyamorous desires are ok with him, how should i broach the topic with my crush? he seems like a pretty monogamous-minded person, but i also know we have some seriously strong desire for each other, and you never know.


I don't really want to sleep with anyone else besides these two (although that might change), and I don't want them to meet each other. i don't know anyone else who's poly so all your tips are appreciated thanks!
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