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Old 10-20-2010, 04:30 PM
mumbles's Avatar
mumbles mumbles is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 32
Default Hello from the Pacific Northwest

Hello all,

I came to this board with a problem, and I came away a changed person, with a newfound love of life. A few days here helped me learn how to care about people. Since I plan on sticking around this board, I thought I'd go ahead and do an intro thread. Just to say hey.

If I had to classify my sexuality I'd say it's...uh, 90% straight. I'm not sexually attracted to men, but I do enjoy a lot of femininity, I can't lie about that - I'm a straight figure skater, I guess that says it all.

I don't care terribly about defining the nature of my relationships - I don't find labels to be all that helpful.

I married my High School/college sweetheart. We've had some tough times, especially early on. We've both dealt with severe anger/temper issues. Sometimes well, other times not so well - but those are distant memories.

We've been together for 10 years, and married for 3 and some change of that.

I've always had close relationships with women - when I go down the list of my life's closest friends, there are a few of each, men and women. I think it's my slightly-to-occasionally-very feminine side that draws me to women... and on top of that, I have a very healthy sex drive, so...it can and has occasionally made things complicated.

What brought me here was dilemma with a friend; incredibly long story short, my wife had given me the "go ahead" to have sex with my friend and people here really opened up my eyes to what it means to really care about people. It's odd - my wife was comfortable with the attraction, and I was comfortable enough showing it - but I'd always felt like I had to hide the stronger emotions; the ones that make me want to protect her and keep her safe. And those were the ones I really, really wanted to have out in the open!!!

My wife is now comfortable about how I feel about my friend. She sees me caring passionately, and I think she appreciates it. I think it helps her know how I feel about her, too. What I do need to do a better job of, however, is talking about MY feelings - sharing them with my wife - because I realized that is what gives her security. It's odd, but we think by hiding something hurtful we're doing someone a favor. But we're not. Love is trust; trust is understanding; and understanding conquers just about everything.

I suppose that's enough. Get to know me!
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