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  #211  
Old 09-12-2010, 05:33 PM
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Originally Posted by GroundedSpirit View Post

I always end up back at the food analogy, but we've never been able to embrace the cultural moors that differentiate casual dining from casual sex and why one is embraced and the other not !
I like that analogy, but this...

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For example - we almost had an encounter the other day. Had it not been for a pressed schedule we would have. Driving down the pike she (as passenger) spotted a guy - kinda cute but not some Andonis. Nice smile. Chose to flash him so I pulled up alongside and kept us synced so she could give him a good show.

Had we not been on a time crunch there's no doubt in our mind this would probably have developed into a totally random sexual encounter. And you never can project where these things end up going long term.
I'd be so scared to just hook up with someone I know nothing about except his looks and what kind of car he drives! You guys are wild!
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  #212  
Old 09-12-2010, 08:32 PM
Tonberry Tonberry is offline
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I definitely need a relationship with someone for sex. I had casual sex in the past and didn't enjoy it.
However, I guess that relationship could be a close friendship, with no intention to ever have life goals together, etc. I don't have any plans for such a relationship right now, but I feel it would work for me. Depending on the definition of casual, this might qualify.
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  #213  
Old 10-14-2010, 03:23 PM
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So this couple that is pursuing me, say they want to be friends, and have sex, but both of them WILL NOT fall in love with me. And I guess I am not allowed to fall in love either.



As if one can predict how feelings will develop.

But I really want to be with a cis-gendered woman... its been a long time.
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Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

me: Mags, 58, living with:
miss pixi, 37, who is dating (NRE):
Master, 32
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  #214  
Old 10-14-2010, 09:53 PM
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Originally Posted by Magdlyn View Post
So this couple that is pursuing me, say they want to be friends, and have sex, but both of them WILL NOT fall in love with me. And I guess I am not allowed to fall in love either.



As if one can predict how feelings will develop.

But I really want to be with a cis-gendered woman... its been a long time.
Magdyln hun, just sit pretty, smile sweetly, flirt, giggle, say all the right things, spread your legs and do as you are told. Better yet, read their minds and be creative. Then let them materbate in you while you shut off from your body and emotions. That's how I got by. its all good, you can do it! :P

Then you will wonder what the hell you did that for and cry inside while you feel your heart is busting out of your chest and your throat hurts from the pain... Or was it the blow job?

Not worth it sweetheart. At least it wouldn't be for me anyway.
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  #215  
Old 10-15-2010, 07:29 AM
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Originally Posted by Magdlyn View Post
But I really want to be with a cis-gendered woman... its been a long time.
Wait a minute, are you not playing the same game? They are being honest with you. Perhaps this is just about sex for you too?
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  #216  
Old 10-15-2010, 06:51 PM
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Originally Posted by redpepper View Post
Magdyln hun, just sit pretty, smile sweetly, flirt, giggle, say all the right things, spread your legs and do as you are told. Better yet, read their minds and be creative. Then let them materbate in you while you shut off from your body and emotions. That's how I got by. its all good, you can do it! :P

Then you will wonder what the hell you did that for and cry inside while you feel your heart is busting out of your chest and your throat hurts from the pain... Or was it the blow job?

Not worth it sweetheart. At least it wouldn't be for me anyway.
Yes, honey, our paths are quite different. After being mono from age 19-53, I need some variety at the moment. Some of my activity is rather casual just now... I don't have a problem with that. My heart and throat are doing OK.

More on the possible 3some later when I've had more time to put thoughts together.
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Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

me: Mags, 58, living with:
miss pixi, 37, who is dating (NRE):
Master, 32
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  #217  
Old 10-15-2010, 06:59 PM
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Perhaps there is a difference in being casual as a young woman vs as a mature woman. or maybe it's just a matter of why you are interested in casual sex. If you are in it for you and not to please others I think that it is a much more positive activity. Enjoy your newly acquired freedom Mag.
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  #218  
Old 10-15-2010, 10:39 PM
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So Magdyln. what is the issue then, if you are good to go then why the disappointment in them saying that you and they are not allowed to fall in love... it sounds like its the furthest thing from your mind anyways. Shouldn't you be all good to go... everything on board, no fear of being hurt and misunderstood. Fill your boots. What does it matter if you aren't into them emotionally anyways.

I don't get it.

I'm not sure what you mean by the age thing Derby. It was a long lull that lead me to where I am now with sex. I was a slutty whore in my earlier years. Magdyln seems to be the opposite. I am not sure age has anything to do with it... I purposely waited to have a child so I could continue to sow my wild oats... even if I was married. I have a friend born on the same day and year as me. She is now on the dating scene as her kids are out of the house... she had them when she was in highschool. She is not anywhere near a slut and thinks like I do... quality, not quantity. Not even a balance of both. It makes it hard for her to date. She was raising kids during her years where she felt like being more loose. I think it's more personality and what life dishes out for you... what you pick too, than age and sluttiness.

sorry for this hyjack, maybe I should break this off into a new thread if Magdyln is in agreement?
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Last edited by redpepper; 10-15-2010 at 10:43 PM.
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  #219  
Old 10-16-2010, 02:54 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Magdlyn View Post
So this couple that is pursuing me, say they want to be friends, and have sex, but both of them WILL NOT fall in love with me. And I guess I am not allowed to fall in love either.



As if one can predict how feelings will develop.

But I really want to be with a cis-gendered woman... its been a long time.
Ummm....Have you read my thread "on again, off again, on again"?

My wife and I were dating a cpl that was like that. Then, one day, I realized that I had developed feelings for the wife of the other cpl. I mentioned this to my wife....she agreed that, after 3 yrs in the relationship, she had as well. Well, one day, the hubby of the other cpl saw me looking at his wife "the way he looks at her". I got caught while feeling. Anyway, this scared him.......She and I spoke alone one day. We said that it may be a while, but maybe we could again have what we once had. She agreed that she felt the same feelings that my wife and I did. She even said that if he hubby was not in the picture, she would TOTALLY be on board with moving in with the two of us. But....I explained to her that I didn't WANT her to break up with her hubby, and my wife and I certainly weren't going to break up....soooo...we were stuck. Then I got a job with her hubby. That was a bad move, but I needed the money. I still work with him currently, and it hurts every day at work.

What I'm getting at is this: If you become involved in a relationship with them, you WILL eventually develop feelings of love for them....Even if one or both of them don't for you. Why? Because you are open to it....even if they are not.
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  #220  
Old 10-16-2010, 03:13 PM
MyNameIsMaam MyNameIsMaam is offline
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For me, sex comes after the emotional connection. Otherwise, it just feels like I am being used.
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