Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > Poly Relationships Corner


Thread Tools Display Modes
Prev Previous Post   Next Post Next
Old 10-13-2010, 06:11 PM
newbee86 newbee86 is offline
New Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 1
Default Sticky Question, hope you can help

I am pretty new to all of this, I went from being a swinger, to having an exclusive poly relationship to having an open poly relationship with "Bob" and "Nancy".

I have been seeing "Bob" for about 5 years and Nancy is a new addition to our relationship. A year ago, my job moved me 4 hours away and shortly after Bob started seeing Nancy. My move put all the unwanted strain of a long distance relationship on Bob and I. Not so much that we were having difficulties, but I felt that we were becoming distant and he asked me a couple of months ago if I would be comfortable meeting Nancy and if I would be open to him making her his other girlfriend. After some deliberation, I agreed.

As this change was taking place, I also met a delightful young lady and developed a casual sexual relationship with her.

As time is passing I hear from Bob less and less, and see him even less often.

He recently texted me and told me that he had herpes. Number 1, I felt disrespected that he didn't call me, as this is a HUGE conversation that needs to be had. I have scheduled testing for myself, (though once we started adding partners I insisted we use protection), but I am having mixed emotions.

I don't know if I want to continue our relationship, not so much in a emotional sense but in a sexual sense. I don't really know what to feel. I honestly don't think I want to risk contracting the virus as it is so unpredictable. I love this man, maybe less than I used to as time and distance has separated us. I don't want him to think that I find him disgusting or that I don't feel for him any more, but the risk just seems too high.

Is it time to call it quits and just suggest a more friendly relationship? I know he'd be understanding that I don't want to continue a sexual relationship, but I almost feel like I am betraying him. It must sound stupid. I don't really know what to do.
Reply With Quote

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

All times are GMT. The time now is 07:34 PM.