Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > Poly Relationships Corner


Thread Tools Display Modes
Prev Previous Post   Next Post Next
Old 10-12-2010, 08:10 PM
crazy1789 crazy1789 is offline
New Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 2
Unhappy Bit of a problem with one of my partner's lovers

So there's this man, lets call him ... Felix. My girlfriend and I had an incredible threesome with him about 6 months ago. After which a lot started to go wrong between him and me. I was feeling very strong emotions towards him and his primary relationship only really allowed him to have casual sex. I still have no idea how he feels about me - he keeps his feelings hidden (although he recently said that he felt bad after our threesome and didn't want that to happen again)

I decided it was probably best for us both if I bow out and keep things platonic between me and him. My girlfriend and him have been continuing their "casual" relationship since then (although they've only seen each other a few times since then). However, recently things appear to have changed when it comes to Felix's relationship boundaries with his wife. She has now got a secondary boyfriend and it appears that Felix is now open to the idea of a more involved relationship.

Tomorrow my girlfriend and I are going to the city where he lives (my sister also happens to live there). The original plan was that I would spend some time with my sister and also see Felix, but as time is so precious for the two of them I once again decided to bow out and not see him while my girlfriend and him have lots of sex.

So I'm beginning to feel a variety of emotions when it comes to this man. I'm a little bit envious of my girlfriend having delightfully sensual evenings with him. But I wouldn't want to deny her of the happiness that such evenings bring her, and I don't think her not having him would really help me feel any better. And I feel a little guilty that my feeling sad about this might make it less likely that they will enjoy their time together. And most of all I don't want to ruin anything that she has with him! I just wish I could talk to him about this, but last time I tried he simply told me that he wasn't willing to discuss his emotions with me. I feel like my only option is to let my girlfriend get close to him and get some answers out of him for me so that maybe I can find some peace with the situation.

Sorry this is probably quite a rambling post. I was wondering if anyone has been in a similar situation where you have feelings for your partner's lover?
Reply With Quote

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

All times are GMT. The time now is 09:34 PM.