Redpepper's journey

[TruckerPete]

My (admittedly limited) experiences in this area have led me to believe that I simply wouldn't enjoy this play with someone I didn't trust completely. It is that exchange of trust which is so thrilling. I simply can't imagine giving that to a stranger, or receiving the same from them.

[Derbylicious]

Originally Posted by TruckerPete

My (admittedly limited) experiences in this area have led me to believe that I simply wouldn't enjoy this play with someone I didn't trust completely. It is that exchange of trust which is so thrilling. I simply can't imagine giving that to a stranger, or receiving the same from them.

That's exactly how I feel too!

[Confused]

Me too, completely.

[redpepper]

thanks for the post Gemini... I can't think of anywhere to put that post...

I try and live by example. As I do in poly... taking other people as examples is how I got here... I am still take others as an example and make out of it my own life. I hope that by expressing myself and keeping at my journey of life in many areas that it will be put to use as I have put others expressions to use.

So the journey of obtaining my room has begun. PN, Mono and I have been emailing back and forth on a group email for a week now trying to figure out details of Mono's move. The tenants we have in the suite in the lower part of our house will be moving out in two weeks. I will be able to make up my room after that and we can see about what needs to be done down there.

So far rent has been discussed first. That and hydro, internet etc... all the boring stuff to me really. I left that all up to the men.

Next is what I need to create my room. I have been saving art work, a lamp, a bed head and a chest with all my ritual stuff in it for years, waiting for this moment. I need a double bed, bedding, a small desk a night stand and a comfy chair. I can't wait to get started!

I have been trying to get PN on board with the idea that he will have his own room also! He gets the best bedroom in the house! Lucky man...

I've also been talking a lot with the boy about what it will mean that I am down stairs more often. He doesn't want to come down there, but I am trying to explain that he is welcome and that I will be lonely for him if he doesn't. He can bring our new guinea pig there, play his DS, bring books... snuggle and watch movies... My biggest fear is his lack of mumma time. The rest is negotiable. With kids it's more difficult. Time will tell. At least I will be home and near him instead of across the city!

[SNeacail]

I'm sure that once your tenants are gone and the downstairs is incorporated as part of your home as a whole, he will have no problem with it. Have him help you fix it up, that way he feels some ownership of it also.

[MonoVCPHG]

I'm excited thinking about each of you getting more space! I love personal space and will be interested to see what each of yours looks like ultimately. If things are working and we put a door in, then I think a lot of our lives will just flow back and forth.
Maybe I'll plant something of my own in the garden...something to share, but something to nurture by myself...who knows but I am looking forward to using the back yard more as a family...and a house warming party!

[redpepper]

I am holding back on being excited. I'm anticipating excitment but really I'm worried about my connections with everyone. I don't want to spread myself too thin and find I don't use my room. My relationship with PN is an effort at times and I don't want to leave him out, child stuff is hard sometimes and I want to make sure I deal with it, Mono enjoys his time alone and I don't want us to bug him too much... So much to consider!

[geminigirl]

Hey RP, just remember that everyone deserves their own space and quiet time. Your son gets his own room, and he'll understand why you get one, too. Having "me space" makes us all healthier and much more fun when we do get together with the loved ones of our choice, right?

Yay, so happy that you're finally getting something you have needed for a long time!

[Derbylicious]

Originally Posted by redpepper

I am holding back on being excited. I'm anticipating excitment but really I'm worried about my connections with everyone. I don't want to spread myself too thin and find I don't use my room. My relationship with PN is an effort at times and I don't want to leave him out, child stuff is hard sometimes and I want to make sure I deal with it, Mono enjoys his time alone and I don't want us to bug him too much... So much to consider!

Even if you aren't using your room all the time just knowing that it's there for an escape when you need it will probably be good for you. You already schedule yourself so well, including your "me time" that it will probably go much more smoothly than you are expecting once you have that space. The only difference is really going to be that no one has to travel to be together or apart anymore.

[redpepper]

thanks guys... time will tell, patience.

Planning a halloween party I think as a house warming... still in progress. have to get the old energy out of there and fuse it with new energy from friends!