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  #11  
Old 08-29-2010, 06:18 AM
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i have been getting a lot of flak from one of my friends about my poly leanings. I get that she cares about me and doesn't want to see me hurt but every time I try to explain things to her, she doesn't want to hear about it. I am not going to change the way I am to suit her but it is very frustrating as she is one of my best friends (as well as my roomie). Her comment when i told her I was poly was that she didn't want a revolving door on our house. I tried to explain that it's not all about having sex with random strangers but she doesn't really get it. she has zero problem with my bisexuality.

I'm not looking for advice on this one, she was in a LTR that ended badly with her BF of 9 years cheating on her and so is having trust issues with guys in general. She doesn't think that this love style will work for her and so I think that she thinks it shouldn't work for me. I will just carry on living how i live and she can disapprove or not as she sees fit, I will not try to change her mind any longer...

Just a rant to get things off my chest, I feel much better about this thanks.
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  #12  
Old 08-29-2010, 07:24 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by assets View Post
I will just carry on living how i live and she can disapprove or not as she sees fit, I will not try to change her mind any longer...

Just a rant to get things off my chest, I feel much better about this thanks.
Sometimes there really isn't much else to do is there?!

And no problem...that's what we're here for....I think. Maybe.
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  #13  
Old 09-29-2010, 03:02 AM
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i was just rereading some old posts of mine on the board from when i first joined and was having issues with my exes. i am soooooooo happy to be out of that relationship and be in my own space. I totally get RedPepper's need/want/desire for space. i didn't have any at all in my former relationship. i had no physical, mental or emotional space in that house. Now the only creatures I share my space with on a regular basis are my roommate, my two cats and her dog. I have my own (big) room, we also have a den, a living room and a big deck. It's so great to not have to share all my living space with everyone i live with. Well i still have to share with the cats, but they're pretty quiet (most of the time...)

This forum was such a great help for me when my relationship was breaking down. i felt like there were people listening to me (the exes weren't) and that someone out there cared that i was hurting. I have been thinking a lot lately about my old relationship and how glad I am that it's over. I am so excited for the next phase in my life to see where that goes. Thanks to everyone that tried to help me out and that has made me feel welcome and wanted around here. Okay now I'm just getting a bit cheesy and I'll stop.

Hopefully there will be some exciting developments happening in my life soon...
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  #14  
Old 05-11-2016, 01:25 PM
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It's been a very long time since I last posted here. Life has been interesting. I just started a new job at a local craft brewery, the brewmaster is teaching me and another woman (who happens to be a friend of mine)the ins and outs of the industry. It's all pretty boring to the average human being but super exciting to me.

I am currently in a fairly new relationship with an amazing man, let's call him Wolf, we have developed very strong feelings for each other in a very short time. We both thought that it would be one of those relationships that burns bright for a couple months and then fizzles. That hasn't happened yet and I couldn't be happier. I recently met his wife and we got along very well. She just seems like a very cool person. I'm also dating casually, I haven't met anyone of note as of yet but working on it is fun

Recently I have had some very serious issues with one of my housemates, she decided to move her boyfriend of a month into her room without discussing it with the rest of the house. Originally there were 4 of us living here, now there are 6! One of her friends came to stay with us also. Fortunately they are moving out at the end of the month. There have been other things, like eating other people's food, drinking their alcohol, leaving doors wide open when leaving the house and just generally being disrespectful to everyone.

This stress, coupled with taking on a new job that is a significant pay cut and Wolf starting to date another woman sent me into a tail spin. I have suffered from depression and anxiety in the past but have successfully controlled it without meds. Not this time though. I spiraled out of control for about a week and a half but finally saw a doctor and am starting to get my control back. I guess this situation brought up a bunch of insecurities I have (thanks anxiety) particularly in my relationship with Wolf. Fortunately he and I were able to talk them through and get a greater understanding of how the other thinks and both of us feel better and closer after our discussion. I was able to talk to him about his date and be genuinely happy for him whereas before I was a total mess.
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Assets - bi poly female, early 40s
Wolf - partner, married poly straight male late 20s
Daisy - Wolf's wife, poly, late 20s
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Last edited by assets; 05-11-2016 at 03:10 PM.
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  #15  
Old 05-16-2016, 07:20 AM
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I've been struggling with what to write here. I have so many thoughts and emotions running through my head right now that I'm so confused and can't really seem to put it in to words.

I'm overwhelmed with my own emotions, I'm trying to deal with them. My partner is a big time fixer and doesn't like to see the people he loves struggling and so takes on a lot himself. I have been an emotional mess and dumping on him, and so he's been taking it in and pushing it down and not feeling his feelings so he can be strong for me. This led to him having a breakdown after he left my house today and now I feel guilty about it. I don't want him to take everything on and get overwhelmed himself but I also want to be able to talk about things with him.

Our communication.styles are really similar, we have a hard time with certain types of communication. Namely when it revolves around taking care of our selves. We have both agreed that this is something we need to work on both separately and together. We made a couple of agreements on how we were going to deal with my feelings of struggling with insecurity in our relationship and communication on when we needed space and closeness.

I
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Assets - bi poly female, early 40s
Wolf - partner, married poly straight male late 20s
Daisy - Wolf's wife, poly, late 20s
Lynn -Wolf's gf, poly
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  #16  
Old 05-22-2016, 03:26 AM
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My life has been ticking along. I really don't have much to write about. My anxiety gets the better of me from time to time but I'm controlling that through the wonders of modern medicine.

Tonight I'm going to karaoke with my partner, his wife and some of their friends. I have met his wife once before and we got along well. However I'll be meeting some of their friends for the first time. Plus spending an extended period with him and his wife. Should be an interesting evening. I'm actually looking forward to it.
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Assets - bi poly female, early 40s
Wolf - partner, married poly straight male late 20s
Daisy - Wolf's wife, poly, late 20s
Lynn -Wolf's gf, poly
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  #17  
Old 05-28-2016, 11:42 PM
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So I've been really struggling recently with my moods and trying to keep balanced. My brain keeps coming up with worst case scenarios about everything. Particularly my relationship. I'm feeling so lonely these days. I know that wolf loves me but it's just not enough. I often think I would be better off on my own then I wouldn't struggle with feeling alone, unwanted, not good enough. The thing is that he tells me every single day that I am not alone, I am wanted, I am good enough. I struggle to get my brain to believe it. I'm so sick of feeling alone all the time.

I have had a series of events that happened in my life that lead me to have a depressive episode. I'm on meds and trying to regain some equilibrium but the smallest thing happens and I can't function. I am looking into counselling. I have just started over in a new career and so money is very tight, my paycheque pretty much just pays my bills and not much else. I've had to give up doing the sport I love because I can't afford it.
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Assets - bi poly female, early 40s
Wolf - partner, married poly straight male late 20s
Daisy - Wolf's wife, poly, late 20s
Lynn -Wolf's gf, poly
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  #18  
Old 06-13-2016, 01:28 AM
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I'm so ready to give up on online dating! I'm so frustrated. 😖 It seems like every single person that sends me a message turns out to be a giant doucherocket or or they just ghost after a short time!
I get quite a few messages, most of them seem alright to begin with. Alright enough that we get to the stage of talking about meeting, often deciding on a time and place. At this point the messages go one of two ways. Either they just completely stop talking to me or they turn into the aforementioned doucherocket. In the past two weeks, I've gotten two dick pics, a few requests to meet to have sex, that night and a couple of requests to help them cheat. I clearly state that I'm looking for dating and not a hookup and reiterate that in my conversations with them but it doesn't seem to get through. I'm so done with it all!

I'm very thankful for my partner, he's amazing. I love him to pieces.
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Assets - bi poly female, early 40s
Wolf - partner, married poly straight male late 20s
Daisy - Wolf's wife, poly, late 20s
Lynn -Wolf's gf, poly
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