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Old 08-16-2010, 04:53 PM
jkelly jkelly is offline
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Join Date: May 2010
Location: San Francisco, CA
Posts: 168

Originally Posted by DazednConfused View Post
He told her they need to 'cool it' this week cause it's our anniversary week, she says to me 'he's one hell of a guy'. My mind goes right to no, the married guy fucking my wife is not one hell of a guy. I just can't help the nasty inside of me, the anger, pain.!
I wouldn't discount your opinion here as being "the nasty inside of you". I mean, you may be angry and hurt, but you're also simply correct -- he doesn't deserve praise for what he's doing, and it's alarming that your wife thinks he does. Just because you're angry doesn't mean your assessment of the situation is less accurate than hers.

Originally Posted by DazednConfused View Post
He writes me back that it was an accident, and he's ready to stop for me, I just have to say the word. WTF! Mind fuck much? Of course I can't 'say the word'. It's not up to me.
I generally agree with everything Mono's written in his last posts, but I would also say that you're kind of right about this and calling his bluff is probably not going to work. What is really up to you is what kind of relationship you want with your wife and your (former?) friend. I get that you still want to make your marriage work, but I hope that you don't add sacrificing your career to the list of things you've done to hold onto it.
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affairs, cheating, cheating and poly, endings, neglect, self sacrifice

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