Originally Posted by rabbit
From what I can tell there are:
-People that are innately poly and need a poly lifestyle to be happy.
-People that are innately poly but do not need a poly lifestyle to be happy.
-People that are innately mono but do not need a mono lifestyle to be happy.
-People that are innately mono and need a mono lifestyle to be happy.
Obviously this is way oversimplified and it is much more of a spectrum.
Actually, I think that pretty concisely sums up the poly spectrum. You're either poly or you're mono, and you either need that lifestyle or you don't. As long as we're assuming that "mono" in that description refers to love... as we've seen, things get complicated when we start talking about open relationships with respect to sex.
Originally Posted by AutumnalTone
Just so ya know, my wife and I are poly AND we have an open relationship. We're free to have relationships and casual sex, so I'm certainly not bashing fucking around. I just expect accuracy in descriptions.
I think this is the most useful description. No one ever said that a couple being polyamorous and swingers are mutually exclusive, only that one is not the same as the other just because someone does both.
I eat beef and I eat chicken, each make me a meat-eater (analogous to non-monogamous). But eating beef is not the same as eating chicken. Some people eat beef but not chicken, some people eat chicken but not beef, but those people are all still meat-eaters. And some people are vegetarians, analogous to monogamous, meaning they eat neither meat nor chicken.