Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > Fireplace


View Poll Results: Is masturbation sex?
I'm a woman and I vote yes 28 24.14%
I'm a woman and I vote no 28 24.14%
I'm a man and I voted yes 16 13.79%
I'm a man and I vote no 25 21.55%
I'm gender-variant and I vote yes 1 0.86%
I'm gender-variant and I vote no 1 0.86%
Magical brownies 17 14.66%
Voters: 116. You may not vote on this poll

Thread Tools Display Modes
Prev Previous Post   Next Post Next
Old 07-08-2010, 08:12 PM
immaterial immaterial is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Arizona
Posts: 135

This is a very interesting thread. I wish there were more responses. I really think it is a very odd topic. Where does sex begin? I've known folks who actually believe sucking cock is not sex. Anal penetration by a penis is not sex. Handjobs are not sex. Giving oneself a handjob is not sex. Etc.

Then there are those who seem to think these behaviors are sex, but they don't constitute a breaking of commitment.

I used to go to erotic massage places and get handjobs. I did this when I was in "committed monogamous relationships." I think part of my rationale was that it wasn't sex. How convenient! Really, it doesn't matter what label I put on a behavior. It's about open, honest, ethical communication.

Lots of trouble with one of my sig others started when she "caught" me masturbating. I thought she had left the house and I was getting off and she heard me. (I can be kind of loud). For her, it was real betrayal. For me, it was a source of deep resentment, a feeling I had no privacy in my own home. These sorts of collisions are the stuff of relationship catastrophe. She gets to feel betrayed by my autoerotic sex life and I get to feel pissed off at her for violating my privacy. Ugh.

If I look at porn and get turned on, is that betrayal? If I fuck someone else but think about you the entire time, dear, is that commitment? :-)

Reply With Quote

definitions, masturbation, sex

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

All times are GMT. The time now is 11:09 AM.