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  #11  
Old 05-25-2010, 06:31 PM
Karelia Karelia is offline
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If three of your four children were conceived using condoms, I have to ask why is that the only protection being used right now? It doesn't seem like the best plan when it sounds as though none of you are ready yet for her to be pregnant.

There are so many options to prevent pregnancy, and typically condoms are the least effective choice. She might want to consider the Pill or even a Mirena IUD. While there's a slight risk of infertility from Mirena, it is very slight. Doctors give it to women who have had children and may want more. Usually, they won't take that small risk with a woman who hasn't had any kids, but wants them eventually... but Mirena is reversible and unlike the old IUDs has such a low risk that it is often a good choice.

Even just adding a spermicidal insert before intercourse would improve the efficacy of the condoms, and there are no hormones involved. Just don't add that until any oral sex has been finished. I learned about that the hard way, lol.
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  #12  
Old 05-29-2010, 04:53 AM
poiyt poiyt is offline
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We are also charting to avoid. Neither of us like hormonal birth control for a variety of reasons. We are looking into getting sponges as an option as well as condoms. No the current situation isnt the best - but really..how many times can condoms fail..they are supposed to have a 97% success rate, so why would they not work for one specific person...yk?
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  #13  
Old 05-29-2010, 02:50 PM
Fidelia Fidelia is offline
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Maybe your DH has super-sperm?
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  #14  
Old 05-29-2010, 08:18 PM
MyDemonsMyAngels MyDemonsMyAngels is offline
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Hahaha...super sperm... that made me laugh
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  #15  
Old 05-30-2010, 07:32 AM
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SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by poiyt View Post
We are also charting to avoid. Neither of us like hormonal birth control for a variety of reasons. We are looking into getting sponges as an option as well as condoms. No the current situation isnt the best - but really..how many times can condoms fail..they are supposed to have a 97% success rate, so why would they not work for one specific person...yk?
While it may seem like using condoms is pretty straight-forward, they aren't adequate enough for everyone. "Smaller" men may experience slippage, they might not be getting applied properly, other medications that you're taking may weaken the latex... Intercourse is not required to conceive, especially if you're both very virile. If the male gets very excited, there can be a large amount of pre-ejaculate which can make its way onto the outside of the condom.

Don't know where you're getting the 97%, but the stats I'm reading say 12-15% failure rate, as high as 36% with teenagers.

If you're having this much trouble with them and you aren't willing to use hormonal methods, I would at least take a family trip to the local sex clinic and sit down with a nurse to learn proper application and how to minimize risks.


Of course, there's another more devious possibility. I had a friend whose boyfriend was "spiking" the condoms, i.e. poking holes through the package, because he wanted a baby and she didn't. Of course that's a horrible thing to do and the first thing you're going to say is "my husband would never do that" but if you're having a 75% failure rate with a device that's supposed to be 85% effective, then something is clearly amiss.
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  #16  
Old 05-30-2010, 03:20 PM
rabbit rabbit is offline
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The paraguard IUD does not involve hormones. I've had it for over a year and love it.
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  #17  
Old 05-31-2010, 12:30 AM
rubyfish rubyfish is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SchrodingersCat View Post
Don't know where you're getting the 97%, but the stats I'm reading say 12-15% failure rate, as high as 36% with teenagers.
The 12 to 15 % failure rate is with typical use, the 2 % failure rate is for perfect use. To achieve more protection than typical use is not difficult, because typical use includes not always using condoms, penetration before the condom is put on and not doing anything is the condom breaks or slips off (like taking the emergency contraceptives.

Also, in the US, both the Paragard (non-hormonal) and the Mirena (hormonal) IUDs are available to women who have not had children. With an experienced provider and precautions during the first month of use, the risks are incredibly small. I have a Mirena and it was the best health decision I ever made.
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  #18  
Old 06-04-2010, 10:41 AM
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SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
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Maybe it's because I grew up in a different generation and was paranoid enough to take a worst-case-scenario approach... But from losing my virginity on, I NEVER trusted condoms as my sole method of preventing pregnancy. I always thought of them only as STD protection and useless against pregnancy.

When I went through a phase of not wanting to be on the pill, I used a diaphragm with spermicide along with a condom. That's the "riskiest" I was willing to go.
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  #19  
Old 06-04-2010, 04:20 PM
wench wench is offline
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my hubby and i have been using a spermicide film (VCF) since i had a tubal pregnancy rupture - he got me pregnant within a month of us dating! - and since i have latex issues and don't entirely trust non-latex condoms (although still looking into them), horrible pill experience, bad depo experience... spermicide has worked for last 9 months (body not healing well so we are waiting now). It's not 100% effective but what is, and can be used with condoms or other birth control, same stuff that's in sponges... good luck!
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