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View Poll Results: What type of poly origin did you have?
I've always had poly tendencies and never really took to monogamy 20 10.99%
I've always had poly tendencies and tried to be monogamous before 64 35.16%
I fell in love with a poly person and have adapted to the lifestyle 23 12.64%
I read or heard about someone else's poly experiences and thought it could work for me 18 9.89%
Other 57 31.32%
Voters: 182. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 06-02-2010, 11:24 PM
jkelly jkelly is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: San Francisco, CA
Posts: 168

Originally Posted by Anne View Post
Can there exist the wish to live a polyamorous life which is not linked to a special person? In other words, do people feel like "oh, Iīd like to have another partner, letīs get out and find one?"

I always tgought that itīs like in my case: First, there are the specific people, and then thereīs the relationship. How wrong am I?
I'm profoundly uninterested in monogamy, so 'polyamory' started for me by avoiding monogamous relationships, and that's not "linked to a special person".

That said, I don't ever think "I'd like to have another partner" (well, perhaps I thought something like that the last time I was single). I don't go out deliberately looking -- it's always about the specific person.

Some people definitely do just that, however. Sometimes I get a little judgemental about it, because it sounds to me like they're fixated on fitting some new person into some role in their lives that they feel is necessary to have. In other cases, it sounds like they're just really optimistic that there are a lot of people out there that would be great to connect to, and how would you know if you don't look. Which I guess says something good about their opinion of strangers.
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