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  #111  
Old 05-31-2010, 06:49 PM
Ariakas Ariakas is offline
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Franklins journal is just chalked full of great stuff. I love that flow chart, I think it helps visualize a lot of the complexity of non-monogamy...

as an aside...WTF is the 100 mile rule?
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  #112  
Old 05-31-2010, 07:35 PM
saudade saudade is offline
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Default I would walk 100 miles, and I would walk 100 more...

Ariakas: the 100 mile rule (as I've seen it) is a rule where once you're a certain distance from home, on a business trip for example, then it's not cheating to have a sexual-- or even potentially a romantic-- encounter.

It's not for me, but I have a friend who's opening her relationship in that direction, so she can make a road trip to visit a friend guilt-free. (They're further down the open relationship spectrum than a lot of couples I know, but they still call themselves monogamous.)
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  #113  
Old 05-31-2010, 07:54 PM
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the 100 mile rule seems like an blatant rejection of reality...
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  #114  
Old 05-31-2010, 08:05 PM
Ariakas Ariakas is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by saudade View Post
Ariakas: the 100 mile rule (as I've seen it) is a rule where once you're a certain distance from home, on a business trip for example, then it's not cheating to have a sexual-- or even potentially a romantic-- encounter.

It's not for me, but I have a friend who's opening her relationship in that direction, so she can make a road trip to visit a friend guilt-free. (They're further down the open relationship spectrum than a lot of couples I know, but they still call themselves monogamous.)
Sweet...

/planning trip to surrey now...I never knew there was such a rule

[edit]
I really hope everyone can read the sarcasm in my statement haha
[/edit]

Last edited by Ariakas; 05-31-2010 at 10:01 PM.
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  #115  
Old 05-31-2010, 09:58 PM
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CielDuMatin CielDuMatin is offline
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I think that that diagramme makes something that is inherently simple into something that is unnecessarily complicated, but that's just me, I'm sure...

As for the 100 mile rule, if it works for someone, then more power to them - it's not something that I would bring into my relationships, though.
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  #116  
Old 06-01-2010, 06:47 AM
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ya, I'm not getting it either Ceil and I am a more visual learner... there are some things I think I would change too. Nice attempt though.... just not my version. Still, it's his and it is cool he even attempted.
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  #117  
Old 06-01-2010, 07:28 AM
Tonberry Tonberry is offline
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The 100 Mile rule sounds... Interesting. While we have no such rule, my love interests (that is, other than my husband) are all far away, but that's mostly due to meeting them online, so it's more of a coincidence kind of thing.
And I'm not actually in a relationship with them due to the distance, so... Even if I did make a trip, it would be especially to meet them, and my husband would be likely to come along. Sounds far from my situation.

Still, I'm wondering if there are polyamourous people who travel regularly, for their work for instance, and basically have a partner in each place, you know, kind of leading a double (triple, etc) life, except everybody knows.
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  #118  
Old 06-01-2010, 04:37 PM
DharmaBum23 DharmaBum23 is offline
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My rule(that hasn't already been mentioned) is actually pretty basic.

Get a hobby that doesn't involve any of your partners. This is 600x more true if you are not dating more than one person at a time.

If you do not have a hobby(or at least something that keeps you busy), especially when your partner/s are out doing something(or someone) there is a much higher chance that drama will happen.

This is partially true in monogamy but is less important as it is much easier in a monogamous relationship to not do anything that doesn't involve your partner(I've seen it done, many times in fact).
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  #119  
Old 06-01-2010, 07:15 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tonberry View Post
Still, I'm wondering if there are polyamourous people who travel regularly, for their work for instance, and basically have a partner in each place, you know, kind of leading a double (triple, etc) life, except everybody knows.
Have you seen that movie that came out recently? up in the air kinda like that but not really.... ?
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  #120  
Old 06-02-2010, 03:56 AM
Tonberry Tonberry is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by redpepper View Post
Have you seen that movie that came out recently? up in the air kinda like that but not really.... ?
Can't say I have seen it, no. Is it any good?
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