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Old 05-27-2010, 03:52 AM
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SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Canada
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Originally Posted by Superjast View Post
.....the 'reason' people give for breaking-up, is just a excuse.

They don`t want to work on fixing the relationship. Sometimes the real reason is rooted in selfishness, or something awkward. So it`s hard to know when people are using a minor detail, as a full reason, when it is not the actual reason.
Surely you're not suggesting that people never have reasons for breaking-up, only excuses? That every relationship can be "fixed" ?

Some people are just inherently incompatible, and sometimes it takes time to realize it.

Some couples can be very functional without knowing details about their partners' other relationships. Others need to have a good idea of what's going on in their meta-relationships.

There's nothing inherently wrong with either form, as long as it's what everyone is comfortable with and it works for all parties involved.

In this case, Kiin, I think that you have a fair and healthy need to know what's going on in your husband's life and his other relationships. It seems that your husband is perfectly comfortable sharing that with you, so that's what works for you guys. Since the girlfriend had a need to keep her relationships private, it simply means they're incompatible. No reason for you to feel guilty over that.
As I am sure any cat owner will be able to tell you,
someone else putting you in a box is entirely different
from getting into a box yourself.
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Old 05-29-2010, 11:50 AM
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candi candi is offline
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Maine
Posts: 24

My husband and I believe in total honesty. We talk about anything and everything...it's just something we really enjoy...reliving some of the experience's with each other. We call it "coffee time". I also know that the other couple enjoy's talking about the experiences. There is nothing in our quad relationship, that couldn't be put out there on the table. In our particular case, if someone had "something to hide", then there is a problem in the relationship.... Candi
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