New & Confused Girl
I started to date a guy about 4 months ago. He has been introducing me to the art of loving, and in that came polyamory. I am feeling totally cool about this, except when there is separation and or non participation of some involved. We live together and are also running a business. A few weeks before he met me he was seeing another girl, but wasn't sexual with her until after we had dated. He slept with her the first time when I was out, so I wasn't included in the act, and other times when a friend came to play with us, he left us alone to be with her. She has no interest in being with other girls and won't get close to me at all. We run a massage center and have offered her several times for a four hand massage, she won't even accept my massage. So here's the thing, when she does come around he doesn't even talk to me. I mean we live together, I think that's pretty crazy. I feel as if Im what he's into if no one else is around, but would much rather be with her. They kiss and make out in front of me and he shows NO AFFECTION towards me in front of her, he pats me on the head or kisses my head as if I'm a child. Even they have had sex in front of me when we were in a lake and it was only three of us. I just decided I can sit here and watch them...they aren't even noticing that Im here, or I can stare at this water fall for another 30 mins, or get out. So I got out.. When I ask why he ignores me when she's here, he says he doesn't, that I don't involve myself. Did I mention we're in latin america and my spanish is very basic, how does he expect me to butt in on conversations when I barely speak the language? His answers, is I don't understand it because I'm not loving enough to try. Di d I mention she was married to an American guy, has lived years in the United States, and speaks english fluently. I know that she pushes for conversations in Spanish to exclude me because I lack the speaking ability. The second I walk out of the room she jumps him, it's like she's waiting for that chance. I just don't know what to do, how I feel, I feel that I've learned so much from this, and I love him so much, and I want to have fun but why do I have to be the one to convience so hard, why doesn't he require her to do that. WHy can't he show affection for me in front of her, because I'm stronger? I am the one that cried, how does that make me stronger? Please help
Last edited by lostgirl; 05-15-2010 at 12:54 AM.