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Old 04-30-2010, 06:04 AM
SchrodingersCat's Avatar
SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Canada
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Default Does dating a couple ever work out?

I got a distressing [long distance] phone call from one of my best friends today. They're a poly couple, I'll call them Jack and Jane. Jane called me needing a poly-friendly ear, as due to her job she cannot be out of the closet. The only two friends who know they're poly are monogamous themselves.

Jack and Jane met a couple at a poly meet, I'll call them Matt and Mary. My friends were really into this couple, and thought the feeling was mutual. Jack and Jane invited the couple over for dinner and things seemed to be moving along nicely. Much flirting was exchanged.

Two weeks later, second date with the couple, Jack had to step out to pickup some things, and Mary came with him. Jane and Matt stayed behind.

Jack is a very flirtatious, sexual guy, so he made a move on Mary and they ended up making out. Meanwhile across town, Matt was dumping Jane, stating that he just can't handle this poly thing.

At one point in our conversation, Jane suggested that it didn't seem like Mary and Matt were on the same page. I suggested that it sounded like they weren't even in the same book.

Jack and Jane's relationship started in a whirlwind poly romance that resulted in the breakdown of Jack's marriage when Jack's wife felt she couldn't handle poly while Jack realized he couldn't do monogamy. When Matt dumped her, stating he wasn't polyamorous, Jane felt like she was reliving the whole experience.

It just makes me wonder. I see so many threads on here where a single person starts dating a couple, or else a couple starts dating a single person, and sooner or later it all seems to go haywire.

Are there ANY long-term success stories of couples dating as a couple???
As I am sure any cat owner will be able to tell you,
someone else putting you in a box is entirely different
from getting into a box yourself.
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