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Old 06-08-2014, 03:24 AM
Jade99 Jade99 is offline
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Edmonton, AB
Posts: 10
Smile Idealism... Is it idealistic?

An "ideal" relationship... Loaded question... I would like to have my husband and him his wife. I would like to be in a close relationship with her and trust/communication/respect between all of us. I would like to see us living under the same roof. I am also not sure how closed I would like this to be. If she or I also met someone we had feelings for and could meld with us, I would like that be an option on the table. Decision made by all parties because it would affect all involved whether it be time or emotion.

That's basically how I feel and well I'm sure it could be attainable with the right people. I have lots of love in me and want to share
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Old 08-18-2014, 04:10 AM
maxnsue maxnsue is offline
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 63

We lived our ideal relationship and life. My wife invited her g/f into our bed in the 5th year of our now 45 year marriage. I bought a 4 bedroom house and we each had our own room and used the spare as a office with three desks and computers. Our girlfriend did not live with us full time because she had a kid and we had none. I would say that she spent about a third of her time at our house and all of the holidays and special occasions. We considered her a wife.

She got married about halfway through our relationship to a cuckold she found on the internet whose ex wife left him for her lover. He was more than happy with the arrangement because his wife was with a stable couple, I am sterile and there was no chance of her running off with one of us. She was wife number two in our home and number one in her own. The best of both worlds for her and us.

Sounds like the story line for a porn movie but it was our life and a great life it was. Since we did not have kids, I had a lot of disposable income and we belonged to private clubs and took 8 weeks vacation a year. I only work 3-4 days a week as I am a partner in my business. Strangely enough, we never had a single problem due to our relationship. No one asked why my wife's best friend always seemed to be at our house and we never volunteered to tell anyone about our sex life. It was none of our business. However, when we vacationed or went out on the town, it was as a threesome and the two ladies made sure that everyone knew that. We had a lot of fun shocking straight people in the 70's and 80's
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Old 08-18-2014, 05:44 AM
SuddenlyStoneElf SuddenlyStoneElf is offline
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Boulder, CO, USA
Posts: 36
Default Keeping in mind that I'm a polynewbie and just broken up, forgive the "dating ad"...

I guess my ideal relationships at this point in time would involve enjoying a peaceful period with one or two serious partners within a high-fidelity setting. I'd appreciate mentally mature individuals (beyond their wild oats days), any age is fine as long as they think before they act, and have good communication skills. Personality-wise, heck... I don't have a laundry list... Adventure and excitement are just as fine as quiet for me, but I'm beyond exhausted with drama... I love nerds and geeks but can do without the "unwashed antisocial" stereotypes.

I'd like to be friends if possible with any of their partners. I'm not looking for any type of triad, I'm not sure how I'd manage 3 partners to be honest, but if everyone's willing to give it a shot I guess I am open to finding out.

I'm looking for just enough good will within the group to have some kind of harmony, be able to talk things out when necessary.

I don't require any particular living arrangement... just whatever feels good.

My only big caveat... I'm not really bothered by existing children, however there's no way I'd have anyone's child (except through adoption)--ideally we'd be childfree or the family would have older kids already... I don't do well with babies and toddlers and prefer to not be around them.

TL;DR: am looking for something that feels really good... that's it.
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Old 08-18-2014, 12:30 PM
Emmy37 Emmy37 is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 118

Still trying to figure out what my ideal relationship looks like.
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Old 08-18-2014, 01:37 PM
opalescent opalescent is offline
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: US
Posts: 2,154

I don't think I have an ideal relationship. I have certain needs when in a romantic relationship but a structure or number of partners isn't something I think about much.
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Old 08-24-2014, 04:47 AM
threesnocrowd threesnocrowd is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Boston
Posts: 109
Default That's easy :)

Me, my wife, and her boyfriend!
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Old 08-24-2014, 03:40 PM
Sparky Sparky is offline
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Arkansas
Posts: 20

Ideally, I would be enough for my wife. Next best thing would be a triad with her and another woman.
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Old 03-02-2015, 03:04 AM
drabadi451 drabadi451 is offline
New Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 4
Default Egalitarian vee

My ideal would be an egalitarian vee where I date a male and a female partner with me as the center. I had something to this effect for about a year. The female partner was married and I had a boyfriend, but it was definitely close to said ideal. This was several years ago. Not sure if I could find a girl who would respect me and my current partner's relationship and be committed to me. There is also the issue of finding someone who would get on well with my current partner as a respected friend, etc.
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Old 09-10-2015, 02:51 AM
PolyinMT PolyinMT is offline
Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 20
Default Here to help discover...

Hello! Ideal relationship? I'm doing the mental work to try and figure that out. Joining this forum is an added step that I hope will prove to be helpful. I'm married to a man. I know I want a committed relationship with a woman as well. How exactly I want that to look like? I'm not sure.
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Old 09-15-2015, 10:03 AM
Norwegianpoly Norwegianpoly is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Norway
Posts: 607

The ideal relationship is the one I am in now; dating two men who are friends and get along and care for each other. I like our family! We are not perfect, but we try our best. We have lived 2 years long distance with my boyfriend, and some periods lived together all of us.

The only things I wish for to improve things, are my boyfriend to move to or close to my husband and I, and for all of us to have kids (I would like 1-3 kids and have to start soon if that should ever happen). We are working on getting my boyfriend a work visa so he can work and live in my country.
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