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  #181  
Old 05-10-2014, 11:18 PM
Atlantis Atlantis is offline
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I think you hit the nail on the head NYC, comfort and distraction. I can do that

Busy week with work and class.
Saw Kip yesterday. He totally annoyed me by not cancelling Thursday in a timely manner, I had to chase him up for a yea or nay less than an hour before the scheduled meeting, having previously sent 2 IMs. I later sent an IM which said it is rude to not cancel, especially as he had decided the day before.
I got a phone call and offer for lunch on Friday, I couldn't do that, but we did meet later in the afternoon for some fun. He is heading off for his trip on Monday so I wont see him for a couple of weeks.

I stayed overnight at Joe's. I drank wine. When will I learn? 2 glasses and then a sake with OJ. I had my first experience of "not remember the next day" sex. I remember the start and him saying do you want to lay down at the end. I have no recollection of anything in between. Poor man was "horrified" when I confessed this afternoon, he said he hoped I didn't think he "took advantage" of me. If I was on top I am not sure how he could of, lol.
He said the sex was "outstanding" wish I could remember it. Haha. Never had that happen before. Funny experience.

Prof is back early from his trip, wants to come and hang out tonight. Definite increase in the number of texts. Little chit chat things, fairly constantly throughout the week. Comfort and distraction.
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Prof: 50s male.
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  #182  
Old 05-13-2014, 11:02 PM
Atlantis Atlantis is offline
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Kip is away. Sent me a link for one of the hotels. All I could do not to chew an arm off in frustration. My big envy trigger is travel, by a long shot. But I am working on my travel fund, so positive steps to make something happen.

And speaking of travel, Prof invited me to go to New Orleans for the weekend, pay for my ticket. I did not get my hopes up ( apart from gooling hurricane cocktails) and just as well cause ex said he can't/won't take the kids for the weekend.
I have Friday night off only. I think this is the 7th weekend in a row. This is the man who wants 50/50 time share.

So much travel frustration for me. But I am expecting my tent to get delivered tonight. Just the same as 4 star hotels and rooms on stilts over the ocean, right?

That has been on my bucket list for years, a room on stilts over the ocean. Joe said he will get his travel fund started, he has an idea about on island in Honduras. I would pay a crazy amount for one night is a stilt room and indeed most of them are a crazy amount. We shall see.

The man plan for the week is Prof tomorrow and go stay at Joe's on Friday. We might see Joe and Minijoe tonight if they come up for a swim, it is very hot.

Class is going ok. Picking away it every day and night. I simply don't have the time to do it in marathon sessions. Joe helped me with the tech side last week which was much appreciated.The deadline is Sunday but she wants it handed in on Friday night. Doesn't that make the deadline Friday?
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Prof: 50s male.
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  #183  
Old 05-23-2014, 11:11 PM
Atlantis Atlantis is offline
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Kip has been chatting away on IM, just like old times. Apparently I should have listened when he said he was overworked and stressed, because that seems to have been the case. I think I can see him on Monday if the ex takes the kids for a few hours.

Things are very good with Joe. He hid his OKC profile and I was a bit shocked. We were trying to work out the date of first meeting and I went online to look it up, and he was not there. Said he doesn't want to date anyone else. Oh dear. I couldn't really get into the discussion as Minijoe was in the room. It was a one-sided statement of exclusive dating. I hadn't logged into my account in ages as I changed the password with the hacking concerns of a while ago, and then promptly forgot the new one, so was unaware of this. Hmm. Suppose we need to discuss this. I have really just been enjoying the NRE and the sex has really improved, and haven't wanted to discuss relationships.

Prof. There have been 2 discussions on relationship status there, but not too much in the sense of where I stand.
He told me last week he had made changes to his OKC profile. I was a bit surprised and asked him what he was looking for in a relationship going forward. He said he had no idea but was waiting for normal to return. There was something about he "valued my friendship," I said I wasn't asking about me I just curious about in general. He brought up the topic, not me.
I checked out his profile changes, and it was just very sad. I don't know why he would bother, I would just hide my profile for a while, but I suppose we deal with grief in different ways. He is contemplating taking the summer off from one job, I think that might be healthy.
Fast forward to last night, I was joking about letting me get the tip for dinner, or he would dump me, long standing joke, and he said that Ms. Philly had dumped him today. Ms. Philly was the woman from Xmas who he wanted to do the 3way with. He showed me the text and gave me the back story. She had asked him a couple of months ago to be his primary and apparently he made it loud and clear in a restaurant, much to her embarrassment, that that was not going to happen. She wants to get married, go monogamous, have kids and live "the white-picket dream." His kids have graduated college, no way is going down that path again. So she decided that if that wasn't possible then she was done with him. So that sparked more talk about his dating future. Seems awfully rushed considering how recently Ms Text passed, but he wants to talk about so I am letting him.

He asked me if I wanted to be "primary". I said how about you rethink the hierarchical model entirely. He kind if agreed and pointed out that the previous rules are no longer valid and he is free to do what he wants. He did he is also say he is rethinking the whole open relationship model. He did ask me what I wanted and I said nothing different but if you do get a primary then please don't do the rules thing again because I won't stick around for it. I said the rules were unkind and he agreed.
So I kind of side-stepped answering the primary question. I think things are fine as they are and I would not want to become part of the model that I found quite distasteful. I think it would require some kind of paradigm shift from Prof. Bottom line is, I don't want anything much different.

He invited me and the munchkins to his street BBQ on Monday. Meet the neighbours and all that. Eek socializing with strangers, I did try to politely decline but he said the kids would love it as they block the street off and there are other kids their age to play with. Couldn't really refuse in the face of that logic, plus no cooking for me.
New Year's Resolution 2014, be more sociable with strangers. It will not be next year's resolution for sure.
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Me: 40s female
Kip: 50s male, married.
Prof: 50s male.

Last edited by Atlantis; 05-23-2014 at 11:15 PM.
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  #184  
Old 05-29-2014, 04:20 AM
Atlantis Atlantis is offline
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My borrowed t-shirt smells like Prof and my bedroom smells like Kip. Quite delicious and highly erotic.
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  #185  
Old 05-30-2014, 02:17 AM
JaneQSmythe JaneQSmythe is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Atlantis View Post
My borrowed t-shirt smells like Prof and my bedroom smells like Kip. Quite delicious and highly erotic.
Totally! When my boys went on a road trip they each left me a freshly worn T-shirt to sleep with.....mmmmmm.....
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Me: poly bi female, in an "open-but-not-looking" Vee-plus with -
MrS: hetero polyflexible male, live-in husband (together 21+ yrs)
Dude: hetero poly male, live-in boyfriend (together 3+ yrs) and MrS's best friend
Lotus: poly bi female, "it's complicated" relationships with Dude/JaneQ/MrS
TT: poly bi male, married to Lotus, FB with JaneQ
VV and MsJ: bi-women with male primaries, LTR LDR FWBs to JaneQ


My poly blogs on this site:
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  #186  
Old 05-31-2014, 06:41 PM
Atlantis Atlantis is offline
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It's lovely, Jane. I slept very well. Smell is such a turn on for me.

So this months class is finished, I have one month "off" and by off I mean working on the un-timed class only, then back at it again. Ugh.

I had decided not apply for any new jobs, my clinical supervisor said I had more than enough to do for the next year, and as a frequently unsupported co-parent shouldn't take on a new job on top of class etc. I must admit she speaks the truth. A survey of family, friends and the men folk confirmed that too. Everyone thinks i have enough to deal with. I kind of thought that but was all excited about a new challenge.
However, I did spot one that is a level up but not too demanding and applied. We shall see.

There has been all sorts going on, but am supposed to be packing the car for camping. . I needed a little sit-down.
The kids are I are meeting JOe and min-joe and having a practice camp.
My 2 haven't been since I was with the ex, but I think we should be able to manage.
I had a super deal lined up with my doggie friends for their spotless wagon/estate car and was going to sell my compact to Prof's friend. However the noise in my car, that the dealership maintains is not a noise, put her off, so it all fell through. Looks like I am stuck with my small car. But whilst chatting to Prof about cars etc he said he wants to get a pop-up camper van so he can do trips with me and the kids. 8 hours later he is in talks with someone on Craigslist and planning to go get a cashier's check today to buy it. If various things check out he wants me and the munchkins to drive him up there tomorrow to buy it.
TL;DR Prof is going to buy a camper!!!!! Dont have to worry about cramming stuff in my small car.
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Kip: 50s male, married.
Prof: 50s male.
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  #187  
Old 06-06-2014, 02:52 PM
Atlantis Atlantis is offline
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Camper #1 didn't work out, but Prof is still working on it.
He is very enthusiastic about taking a few trips with me and the kids and a few adult only trips. We will see, it is starting to look a little like much enthusiasm but a challenge to get a reasonably priced van. Apparently 2 dealerships in the state buy them up, do some work and sell them for much higher than the Blue Book Value. Prof has started looking out of state too.

I have seen Kip twice since he returned from his holiday. Things are very good there, sex is still amazing and toe curling. The first meeting was funny, lots of " I love this and I love that about you. I missed you." But no outright, I love you. We are so alike in that regard.

Prof is doing ok, he is out of town visiting his son for the weekend and will back on Sunday after another memorial for Ms Text.
Things are different there, in communication if nothing else. I am now the recipient of "here's my schedule for the week" and I'll text you when I land" and" text you on my way back." Much higher frequency of chit chat texts too. I am also being trusted to store a few very high value items for him while the business is changing locations. I know he didn't ask anyone else to do it. Interesting.

Camping with Joe and Minijoe was fun. I got there first with my 2 kids and was got my carefully researched tent set up, it was a snap. Joe arrived minus the poles for his tent and no flash lights. While we were setting up a camp a woman with a baby stopped to say... she had noticed me with the kids and wondered how I was going manage alone, but now she sees that I have a "helper" so she will not be concerned any longer. I was stunned. The implication was that now there is a man with me, that I will be fine. Joe thought it was hysterically funny, that the woman thought it was me that needed help when he was the one who had forgotten his tent poles. He gave me a lot of "helpless pretty lady" lines. He ended up sleeping in his car and minijoe came in the tent with me and my kids. I think we could have squeezed him in there too but he said no. 6 person tent really equals 4 plus some bags.
It was good that we had a practice. My kids were very well behaved and showed no signs of wandering off, this was my concern last year. And Joe realized that his days of sleeping on anything less than a queen size air mattress are over.
I am looking forward to the 5 days with the kids and Prof in July. We might get another short trip in but summer is already looking pretty busy.
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Kip: 50s male, married.
Prof: 50s male.
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  #188  
Old 06-07-2014, 11:56 PM
Atlantis Atlantis is offline
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I think Polysaturation has been reached for me. 3 partners/lovers seems to be as much as I can, or want to, deal with.
I have no idea how many lovers either Kip, Joe or Prof has, and I don't really care to ask; Kip would probably spin a line even if I did ask. Prof maybe has 2 infrequent lovers, Ms Admin and Ms Bike. I am 99.9% Joe doesn't have any other and I don't intend to ask.
Each relationship is entirely independent of the others, took me a while to work out that is the best for me and for them. I am not lying but I am not giving details about anyone else and they seem to have put that together and don't ask much anymore. Prof has asked a few times about my "friend" and Kip wants sex details.
I have asked them all not to leave any marks on me, I don't care to explain how or whom left what on where This might be a challenge cause I like the bites and scratches. I have respected Kip and Prof's request over the past 2 years, to not to leave any marks, so I think they can do the same for me now. They all profess to not be jealous but they all point the marks out, so best to remove that conversation starter. Plus it is bikini season!
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  #189  
Old 06-08-2014, 09:07 PM
Atlantis Atlantis is offline
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The ex flaked last night. Apparently I had completely misunderstood the "will text by 5 at the latest" conversation, what he meant was, not take the kids at all. Amazing how I could misinterpret it so terribly incorrectly.
In in the same conversation I had asked him about taking the kids over 4th of July weekend, I suspect last night was a kind of a payback, or whatever the word is, at any rate I do not doubt that it was deliberate. He managed the kids 8 nights last month, 6 of them were week nights, about the same the month before. No doubt will be crying for 50/50 at this year's mediation again.

I had to cancel Joe, for not the first, second or third time. He was very nice about it. I had already told him that I suspected a flake so to make alternate plans if he wanted to.

I have written in here how much I hate being a second hand flake and I hate that I still get upset even though I know it was what the ex does and I shouldn't be surprised. But I am.
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Kip: 50s male, married.
Prof: 50s male.
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  #190  
Old 06-10-2014, 11:41 PM
Atlantis Atlantis is offline
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TL;DR Joe couldn't get the vacation place and when I called the ex to say he was off the hook, the ex said he wasn't planning on taking the kids despite the 2 conversations about it, asking his boss, confirming that he wasn't working that weekend, texting and calling me to confirm. I can plan nothing that depends on him.

Good things:
Prof flew to his trip out of town on Thursday and drove back on Sunday in the camper van! It is in very good condition, Mr. OCD wouldn't buy anything that wasn't he has already fixed the minor issues and found that the A/C needed a new fuse, and is very keen to have a test camp. I said I would find something for the weekend after this, hopefully an RV spot is easier to find than a tent spot.

Minijoe is heading to his mum's on Saturday so Joe and I are planning to spend as much time naked as possible on Saturday and Sunday, with pauses for tea and treats, and maybe a curry.

I saw Kip today. Sex sex sex...tea and treats....more sex. He gave me $300 for summer fun. Quite unexpected and very very generous.
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Kip: 50s male, married.
Prof: 50s male.
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