Originally Posted by WhiteCloud
What has helped me the most is NOT trying to project myself into how things will be in the future. That has brought me so much peace
(but that applies to life generally....
This was (and still is) big for me too. I would just assume that each next date that M was going to have would result in a future where, even if I was around, I was getting next to no time with her and I was virtually replaced. I convinced myself that these nightmare futures were distinct possibilities when they were simply remote chances. Once M had gone on a few dates and I stepped back to realize, "Hey, I'm not going anywhere! " then things were good. Sure, i get a tinge of it with each new date still a little bit, but its getting bettwr as time goes on. Im glad youre mastering this faster than I did
Me - male, 42, poly, straight, in a serious relationship with Audrey, also casually dating.
Audrey - female, 20, poly, pansexual, also casually dating.