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  #151  
Old 03-22-2014, 07:18 PM
Atlantis Atlantis is offline
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I've tried that, more sex please! He has some reason why he can't: more later, in the morning, that's enough for now, tired, etc.
That's has been the light hearted approach up to now.
I have also been subtly asking for a wee while now. He has said I that expect more than other partners. Question is do how far do I push the questions? or just deal with it? If he can't then he can't and work on being more accepting?
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  #152  
Old 03-22-2014, 08:04 PM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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I once had a lover who preferred other things to PIV, and I always accommodated him, but at some point had to say, "I like fucking, and want more of it. I like everything else we do, but if there isn't enough fucking, I'm left feeling hungry. I always accommodate your wishes, so I think it's a bit selfish not to accommodate mine more often. Otherwise, I can't help but be disappointed."

After that, he fucked longer and more often. My request played to his ego, I realized, because he hated the idea of being seen as a selfish lover.
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  #153  
Old 03-23-2014, 03:02 PM
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Ok, I will try the blunt approach next time I see him, might be tonight.

Last night was very fun with OKJjoe. We had some dinner first in the Irish pub and then a short walk to the venue. Very diverse age range crowd. The warm-up band were good but the main act was fab. He usually is kind of countryish, bit bluesy but last night was all funk, he even managed to weave in some Beatles and a little Pink Floyd, definitely not country. I gave Joe a few light kisses and he held my hand or had his arm around me for much of the time. It was really good music and vibe, I danced till my overworked quads gave up. The he walked me back to my car and we smooched in the over-lit and very busy car park for a while. He smells good and is a lovely kisser.
We are meeting today to go kayaking. I will need to do some serious stretching, I upped all my weights at the gym yesterday and worked out hard, everything is tight today.
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  #154  
Old 03-27-2014, 02:38 PM
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Sunday with OKJoe was really great, we met at the harbor and spent a couple of hours kayaking up and down the estuary. Seeing the birds and marine life from the water was thrilling, everything was so close, the seals were a trip, popping heads out of the water and barking and wow but the smell is intense.
We had some slightly awkward and nervous first time sex after, played on computers and phones, showed pictures and told stories and had a little more sex. Very nice to spend a whole day with someone and the evening up till bed time. Kind of weird too, none of that "have to go" feeling.
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  #155  
Old 03-27-2014, 11:31 PM
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Trying to catch up a wee bit.
I broached the subject of exclusive dating last night with OKJoe, he said that was his preference, wasn't into dating around. It was my roundabout way of getting to poly thoughts. So I backed off that I went to have a think and talked to mum. She said it is way too soon to be exclusive and Prof and Kip are both nice people so I shouldn't rush into anything just yet. Yeah mum! She said give it a year!!!
I texted OKJOe and said I wasn't ready to do the exclusive thing just yet and he said he agreed, way too soon, and was just speaking in general terms.
Kip, sex, tea, biccies, chat, great, all good there.
Prof. I did the early morning booty call Monday, I woke him up and we had good sex until the alarm rang. He came round later that night and after watching a bit of tv went to bed for a cuddle, I didn't even try to initiate sex. He brought up the subject himself and said he was aware his sex life was really suffering from the effects of stress of Ms. text's illness. She has been very unwell again and is not eating much or taking her meds when he is not around. He feels very responsible for her and worried all the time. He said the morning sex was good because he didn't have time to wake up and start thinking and stressing, he just got lost in the moment.He apologized of it had been affecting me. I said I had noticed the lack of desire and was glad he had explained.
We are going out tonight to see a game and maybe have fun sex but I am not so concerned now. I would actually rather not have sex than have disappointing sex.
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  #156  
Old 03-28-2014, 09:13 PM
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Wow but did Prof and I have fun last night. Had sex first, went to the game, got back to his about 11, got thoroughly trashed and fucked for hours. Lots of dancing round the living room, eating chocolate truffles, drinking.I think we went to sleep about 3am. He set the alarm for 6:15am, we woke up and fucked till I had to leave.
Lots of talking on the drive up and back. We had to make a stop and he picked up a bag of chocolate truffles. I was driving so he handed them to me one at a time, I took a nibble, contemplated the divine flavours gave it back, he nibbled and I finished it. He said we had been together long enough that I trusted him to return the chocolate after having a bite. It was indeed one year this week.
We talked a little about relationships, I am still on Ms Text's hit list, he said whenever they argue my name is the first thing to come up. I told him he wasn't doing a very good job of being a hinge then cause I have never met her, all she knows about me is what he has told her, plus 2 hair clips and a hair elastic.
On the way home we talked about swinging, He has a friend who is exploring an open relationship and wanted to talk to Prof about his. I said I was willing to talk to her too, from the "secondaries" point of view and how not treat people, all sorts to do with what I have read here and in books and around the web. He is going to suggest we swing with her and her partner, I said I was game to meet them. I asked why not as Ms Admin as she is more experienced with swinging and he said he liked doing firsts with me. Sweet
He keeps saying that he "really likes me," I laugh, ridiculous. There is this little comedy clip that we watch and joke about, in it one of the character's ask the other, "Could you love me? Do you love me?" He says that to me a lot. I laugh. We are not allowed to be in love. It's in the rules!
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Last edited by Atlantis; 03-28-2014 at 10:04 PM.
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  #157  
Old 03-29-2014, 09:42 PM
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I have finished this month's class. Yeah! I think July is not going to be possible to get everything finished. I have been slacking on my paperwork at work and I need to do some serious catching up and hold quite a few meetings. The internship part involves 12 projects plus one more month long class. I will give it a good shot but the reality has set in.

I am going to the city with Joe tonight for a comedy club thingy. Things are going well, lots of texting, we have moved a little into sexting. He is driving, another big yeah! I did offer to drive but he said no! Prof loves having me drive him, I rarely get driven anywhere, so it seems like a lovely treat.

Prof was asking how the dating was going, I said very well, Joe and I are getting out and going to do things. Prof then asked me to go to a concert next weekend, I just checked and it was last weekend. d'oh. It did bring up the topic of getting him to commit to events, which, quite frankly, I have given up trying to do. If it doesn't happen on a Wednesday then I am not trying. There have been far too many, "let me get back to you," responses. His reply to that was, my ex is flaky and he has worked with that. Touche. But he seems all gung ho to go to some more live music events with me, suggested doing a munch (for the millionth time) A touch of the competitive side coming out. There was another activity suggested too, I forget what is was. I am not holding my breath. I think he is really struggling with MS Text's illness and the stress. He said he hasn't seen any of his other partners since we had the 3way.
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  #158  
Old 04-03-2014, 02:36 PM
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Ms Text has been in the hospital for nearly a week. I didn't know. She is "not well at all." Prof actually stayed with me on Monday night, which is very unusual, he slept from 10:30 pm to 8:30 am. He woke up a little when I got my shoes to leave but went back to sleep. This is man who usually sleeps 5 hours or less a night. During the evening I asked him a few times if he was ok, he was almost hyperactive, a little wild eyed and being overly joky and teasing. The word I thought at the time was "brittle" ready to crack. Now I know why.
He came round for a little over an hour yesterday evening as he was going to MS Text's doctor. We had some hard fast sex, and I gave him a massage for nearly an hour. He said that was "his hour" for the week. He will be working and staying in the city until next week and is hoping Ms Text will be released in the next day or so.
It is hard for me to know what is ok to ask. I generally don't ask as I feel it is her very personal business and I know she doesn't like me, so it would follow that she doesn't want me to know her medical issues too. It would helps me to understand where Prof is at mentally if I know how she is doing.
We met briefly on Tuesday for a very late lunch hour. I got him great with an April Fool's trick and he wanted to meet. I was trying to plan a short break trip which he was keen on the idea but wouldn't commit to. Lots of vague, "I will have to see, and I can't plan for 2 weeks away" or " we should stay very close to the area". Knowing Ms Text was in hospital meant I wouldn't have asked in the first place. I will explain this to him, maybe he thought I knew.
I had a fun night with Joe on Saturday, the show was great. We came back to mine and had some ho-hum sex but cuddled and kissed till 2:30am. We have plans for Friday night, and I am looking forward to seeing him. Interesting to see if we can match up sex styles. At least there are no ED issues so far.
I got Kip with my April Fool's joke too. I said I had got a job in Dubai, had 30 days to pack up and leave and would he take the guinea pig? He didn't even bother to reply by IM but picked up the phone and first thing he said was "I'll miss you." I continued to wind him up for 5 minutes before I told him. He said he knew it was April Fool's day but didn't put 2 and 2 together. hahaha. I got him goooood.
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  #159  
Old 04-05-2014, 04:37 PM
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Things are going fine with Joe.
I stayed at his place last night. He has a memory foam mattress and I was all interested in spending the night on it. Bloody hell, this morning I have pains in back and they were shooting down my legs too when I woke up. Sleeping in a divot doesn't work for me. It feels firm but molds around you, not good for an active sleeper, I felt like I had to heave myself out of the hole to move around. He was wedged in his divot and I in mine, I don't think we touched all night. Plus he snores, dear god does he snore. Has a sleep apnea machine to help with it but didn't use it.
The sex was ok. The after part was lovely though. The touching and caressing. He didn't cum, said it was the condoms, but in a nice way, not complaining or anything. I said that is a non-negotiable.
His son arrives back today after 2 weeks away. Joe invited me down to meet him. I said no, let him get settled first. I would be a bit grumpy to arrive home after a vacation to find someone new sitting on the sofa. Plus I don't think Joe has said he kind of regularly seeing someone. Would all be a bit much for a 12 year old, I think.
I left my skirt at his place. Didn't even realize till he sent me a message.
Haven't heard much from Prof, he is with Ms Text. A few odd texts and a youtube link.
Kip is very quiet online. We did meet Monday and tried for Thursday but I couldn't swing it
Joe wants me to go back down there, the son's flight has been delayed. 40 mins each way. hmmm
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  #160  
Old 04-06-2014, 03:56 PM
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I went back. Played around in bed for a couple of hours and I left. Booty Call! And remembered my skirt.
Had a little chat about sex later. He said he likes that I laugh a lot and don't take sex too seriously. I replied, isn't that what it's supposed to be? He said he got married young and his wife had a lot of rules and it was more like obligation sex most of the time. Not much laughing or being silly. He calls me "Silly Girl" a lot. At least we have move off "weird" and "quirky." Ha!

There is nothing like getting to know someone to have your quirks reflected back at you. Quite possibly I am getting old and set in my ways. I like to imagine I am all kinds of flexible and easy going, and in certain respects I am. In others, totally not. I have to, have to, walk on the right side of people. Can't take being on the left. It feels so wrong, really uncomfortable. I can do it for about 30 seconds, give it a try and then move myself around. Luckily I have never met anyone who has a strong preference about it. So it is easy to do. I can see that being "weird" lol.

Joe wants me to meet his son. I said a daytime outdoor activity would be best. Maybe bowling, I can bring my 2 as well. It's moving a little quickly but as he is full-time dad we will need to work something out. But then again, I am in no rush to repeat the memory foam and sleeping on the right hand side of the bed experience.
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