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Old 03-04-2014, 02:00 AM
Smiles's Avatar
Smiles Smiles is offline
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 72
Default open or poly?

Hello everybody,

My wife and I have been together for 22 years, married for 13 years. We still get along great most of the time, we are best friends, we co-parent, we have companionship, and we keep an intact home for our daughter.

For 17 years, our marriage was almost sexless. That was fine because she filled a need that no other woman before her filled.

Then several years ago, I hit my MLC. I started to get in shape and sex went from 2X a month to 10X a month. My wife didnt know what hit her. She was fine with sex 2X a month. But I wasnt. I felt I had 17 years to catch up on. My wife and I love each other and she will give me the sex I desire, but it seems to be too much for her. She loves me enough to try. I love her for that...

It started off as her jokingly telling me I need a lover...It continued and she was even telling our close friends that she was OK if I have sex with other women. Still it was sounding like she was joking... we decided to have an open marriage. We have a two page contract for our open marriage agreement. We both signed it along with a witness. One who we talked about our open marriage with over the past 6 monts or so.

Something changed after signing the contract. My wife became more romantic and loving...Maybe it was because I was treating her better...I am nicer, I stopped nicpicking, and stopped bringing up past resentments...all part of the contract. I became a friend again...My wife and I are having better sex and she is orgasms more than ever. I no longer expected or demanded sex anymore . It seemed to take the pressure off of her. I haven't even had an outside relationship yet... Not sexual anyway. I dont know what is really happening in my mind. I feel better though.

I have many female friends. I am a talker. That is a change from years of being an introvert. I enjoy to company of my female friends. I am also very active in a hiking group. I am meeting more women there. I am also making male friends. I havent had any male friends most of my adult life. That is beginning to change as well.

I found this site in hopes to find others like me. I dont know if I am poly minded. I don't want to cheat. I tell my wife about all the women Iam meeting including conversations we talk about. I have been on some lunch dates, but mostly just having fun meeting new people

Eventually I will find somebody with the right chemistry... I have a few potentials and I honestly hope my wife is OK with this arrangement and not hiding any negitive feelings...

I dont know how I will feel when I do have a sexual relationship. I dont want anybody to get hurt especially my wife. I do know if my wife tells he to stop, I will in a heartbeat because I love her more than anything.

I'll be posting more as I progress in my marriage and new relationships

I'll study up on the acroynyms...there are so many...

Last edited by Smiles; 03-04-2014 at 01:10 PM.
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