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  #211  
Old 02-01-2014, 02:39 AM
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Light at the end of the tunnel - wahoo!
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Dramatis personae:
Me: Mono. Divorced, two kids (DanceGirl, 13; and PokéGirl, 11), two cats, one house, many projects.
Chops: My partner. Poly. In relationships with me, Xena, and Noa.
Xena: Poly. In relationships with Chops and Noa, and dating others.
Noa: Married, Poly. In relationships with Chops and Xena (individually).

Blog thread: A Mono's Journey Into Poly-Land (or, "Aw hell, there's no road map?!")
Slightly more polished blog with a mono/poly focus: From Baltic to Boardwalk
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  #212  
Old 02-01-2014, 09:30 PM
MeeraReed MeeraReed is offline
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Glad to hear things are looking up, Mags.

I think you should meet Buddhist and get to know her as a human instead of thinking of her as a "vagina and throat" that Ginger could get diseases from. I think you might like her--I think she's a lot like you.

I've followed your story on this forum with great admiration, but one thing you haven't dealt with much is having female metamours. (Not counting Ginger's wife, who isn't sexual with her husband so it's different). I struggle with that a bit too, but I'd really like to be friends with a cool metamour someday.
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  #213  
Old 02-02-2014, 04:05 AM
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Originally Posted by MeeraReed View Post
Glad to hear things are looking up, Mags.

I think you should meet Buddhist and get to know her as a human instead of thinking of her as a "vagina and throat" that Ginger could get diseases from. I think you might like her--I think she's a lot like you.

I've followed your story on this forum with great admiration, but one thing you haven't dealt with much is having female metamours. (Not counting Ginger's wife, who isn't sexual with her husband so it's different). I struggle with that a bit too, but I'd really like to be friends with a cool metamour someday.
Well, R and Ginger have sex a few times a year! Once a season maybe!

But yeah, it's always been easier when I've met miss p's bfs... Might make the thing with Buddhist easier, if they become a real item. He's not sure how often she will really want to, or be able to get together. 20 miles away, 4 other partners, etc.
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  #214  
Old 02-02-2014, 08:04 PM
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alibabe_muse alibabe_muse is offline
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Mags I'm glad this situation of buddhist and ginger dating is getting easier and that he's taken the time to really listen to you. I also wanted to thank you for your blog, I'm having triggers (since my surgery) too, and knowing that these things sort of damper any ability to have compersion has helped me to realize I'll get it back, it just means my health needs to improve. I look forward to hearing more of your life. hugs
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  #215  
Old 02-05-2014, 08:06 PM
FullofLove1052 FullofLove1052 is offline
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I am glad things are getting better. I was worried about you as I was reading this before the last update(s). It sounded like a shitty situation. Not just because of Ginger/Buddhist/whoever. The basement being flooded and all. I hope things continue to go up from here. xo
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  #216  
Old 02-11-2014, 01:26 PM
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Ginger hasn't had another date with Buddhist since the last time I updated. Heh. He's just number 5 in her "stable" after all... seems they do chat regularly online. He mentions her from time to time. I guess I am getting used to him having yet another SO.

So, we had the asbestos removed 8 days ago, and carpet did go in the very next day. Whew! I spent 2 days bringing our furniture back in from the pod with Ginger, and he even came over one day when I was working at my childcare job, and moved smaller stuff by himself. I overdid it moving furniture this past Sunday, yesterday my arms and upper back were KILLING me. But it's done! Now just the rearranging and organizing of everything to get it all the way we had it. Living area, miss p's home office, media equipment, the big turtle tank, and our collections of vintage items all need to be re-set up.

The pod is still taking up my entire driveway and it won't be picked up til Friday. Can't wait to have my driveway back! I was nervous with the last big storm (14" of snow) since we aren't supposed to park on the street overnight ever in winter in our town. But I didn't get a ticket or towed. Just buried by the plow. sigh...

The half bath downstairs has not yet been done. Our LL is supposed to come over today and put vinyl flooring in there, and also under the washer/dryer. Also one wall in the bathroom is half cut away from having gotten wet and he is going to replace the dry wall and then paint. Somehow I do not think he is going to get all that done in one day...

I am going to Florida on the 19th to see my sister and also spend time with our father and aunt. Going to be gone 10 days. Winter has been very hard, so cold and snowy, plus with this flood and its aftermath, and me and miss p having the flu (still having lingering symptoms after 3 weeks), a vacation in warmth sure will be nice!

Ginger has already asked me to go out dancing and then have him sleep over on the day after Valentine's Day. He didn't claim V Day for himself, assuming my primary and I would want that day. Awww... However, miss p and I do not have any firm plans as of yet!
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Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

me: Mags, 59, living with:
miss pixi, 37

Last edited by Magdlyn; 02-11-2014 at 01:40 PM.
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  #217  
Old 02-11-2014, 01:56 PM
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Glad things are going well and the stuff is inside! You may want to see if they can pick up that pod early - more snow headed this way on Thursday!

Here's hoping that things start getting easier now that the asbestos removal is complete and everything's back inside. Nothing like stress to compound stress!
__________________
Dramatis personae:
Me: Mono. Divorced, two kids (DanceGirl, 13; and PokéGirl, 11), two cats, one house, many projects.
Chops: My partner. Poly. In relationships with me, Xena, and Noa.
Xena: Poly. In relationships with Chops and Noa, and dating others.
Noa: Married, Poly. In relationships with Chops and Xena (individually).

Blog thread: A Mono's Journey Into Poly-Land (or, "Aw hell, there's no road map?!")
Slightly more polished blog with a mono/poly focus: From Baltic to Boardwalk
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  #218  
Old 02-11-2014, 02:14 PM
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Magdlyn Magdlyn is online now
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Originally Posted by YouAreHere View Post
Glad things are going well and the stuff is inside! You may want to see if they can pick up that pod early - more snow headed this way on Thursday!
I know! I am praying it's just rain, as the pod people won't pick up til Friday when the month rental is up! There is already a bank of snow in front of the pod and I am damn well not going to shovel that!

Quote:
Here's hoping that things start getting easier now that the asbestos removal is complete and everything's back inside. Nothing like stress to compound stress!
Thanks! It's just been a month of adding insult to injury around here! miss p and I had had this, "Whee! We've moved in together and are setting up a nice little lesbian/bi/poly household" euphoria this past summer, and it just totally faded when the downstairs flooded and Ginger complicated things with Buddhist. I long for stability, feeling centered, and grounded, so much.
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Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

me: Mags, 59, living with:
miss pixi, 37
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  #219  
Old 02-22-2014, 01:19 PM
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A lot has happened since my last update. In household news, the pod was finally removed from my driveway. It was touch and go since it was covered in and surrounded by snow (my landlord had done most of it). I had to do some last minute shoveling while the pod guy got the support structure around it to raise it and get it on the truck.

But that was done, I got my van back in the driveway and then we had another big snowstorm. And then another.

Ginger had another date with Buddhist, and she had a few copies of a memoir her mother wrote and gave him a copy. They made plans for the following weekend (like, tonight) to have her come out to the burbs and go to this "kirtan," which is a Buddhist call and response chanting thing. And she was to spend the night.

Then on Wed he dropped me at the airport and I attempted to fly to Fla. But lo and behold, yet anotther storm delayed us getting in the air at 1pm. We boarded at 3:30, taxied for a while, got de-iced. Then the pilot said the Phila airport was closed. This was where I was to make my next connection. Then he said the main door of the plane was malfunctioning and we were going back to the terminal! So, we'd spent 2 hours cooped up in those seats for nothing.

At least my seatmate was nice, that helped to pass the time.

Once I got back inside the terminal, I was stressed out and my back hurt. Many people got in line to rebook flights but I didnt have the energy til I had a Coke for some caffiene. I finally got in line, stood for an hour and a half, finally got rebooked for 5am the next day.
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Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

me: Mags, 59, living with:
miss pixi, 37

Last edited by Magdlyn; 02-22-2014 at 03:10 PM.
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  #220  
Old 02-22-2014, 01:28 PM
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Magdlyn Magdlyn is online now
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Then I had to go to baggage claim and get my luggage. At this point it was 7pm so I had dinner and a large glass of wine. Then I had to find a place to charge my phone, and all I could find was an outlet on a pole in baggage and I had to sit on the floor while it charged. I'd been texting Ginger and phoning miss pixi and my sister throughout all the cancellation bs.

Then I looked for a relatively safe area to set myself down until 3:30 am when I could recheck my bag and go through security. I dozed a bit, on and off, in a chair with my feet on my luggage. It sucked, my back hurt worse. Finally at 3:30 I checked my bag, but security had a long line and I barely made my flight.

But I did and we took off for Charlotte NC. I slept one hour of the 2 hour flight. Then I had to run to a different concourse in Charlotte, and I was the last person on the plane! Sheesh.

Finally I got in my sister's car and we had to drive across Florida immediately. Since I was a day late, things were fucked up. Our aunt was flying down too, but over in Ft Myers, nearer our dad's place. We had meant to drive over the previous day and spend the night, then go get Aunt, but now we had to do it at the last minute.

We got her and drove to Dad's. I was a ZOMBIE. I took a 3 hour nap. We got takeout for dinner.

After dinner and socializing I got online, and Ginger told me Buddhist had just broken up with him in chat!
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Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

me: Mags, 59, living with:
miss pixi, 37
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