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  #1361  
Old 01-21-2014, 01:53 AM
JaneQSmythe JaneQSmythe is offline
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Last month I had to go for LEEP - MrS went with me.

Tuesday I had to go for a diagnostic mammo/usn for a lump that Dude found in my right breast. Lotus went with me.

The beauty of poly...any of the three would have accompanied me to either procedure. They ALL offered.

Both results were fine. The fact that I had three people willing to go through the process with me...priceless.

I feel soooo loved, sooooo cared for.

I know that if either procedure had required follow-up treatment I would have had the support of all three. (And all three would have supported each other in their concern for me....)

I feel so cherished...and know that my SOs have the support that they would need should something have required their concern.
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Me: poly bi female, in an "open-but-not-looking" Vee-plus with -
MrS: hetero polyflexible male, live-in husband (together 21+ yrs)
Dude: hetero poly male, live-in boyfriend (together 3 yrs) and MrS's best friend
Lotus: poly bi female, "it's complicated" relationships with Dude/JaneQ/MrS; married to TT, poly male
VV and MsJ: bi-women with male primaries, LTR LDR FWBs to JaneQ


My poly blogs on this site:
The Journey of JaneQSmythe
The Notebook of JaneQSmythe
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  #1362  
Old 01-21-2014, 10:46 AM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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Default Dipping my toe back into OKCupid

I had my OKC account disabled for quite a long time - not sure but it was at least six months, probably longer. Turned it back on, noticed the site's changes, and poked around a bit. For someone who lives in a big city, it seems like pretty slim pickins' here. I get a lot of results when I do a search, but wind up Hiding most of them without even visiting their profiles. I just want not to see them pop up in searches anymore - I hate to admit it but there are a lot of ugly people in NYC. Either that, or their pictures turn me off for other reasons. I especially love the guys who are definitely in their 70s claiming to be in their 50s, as if we can't tell. Ugh. Then I search for poly and variations on that word, non-monogamy, etc. and get maybe two or three people. A few searches, with minor changes to distance and "last logged in," came up with no one! Not a one.

Then the Inbox starts lighting up. Jeeee-zus! What losers with their lame, "hi how r u 2nite?" "nice smile" and "What's up sweetheart?" That is the full contents of three messages I received from guys who were like 20% to 30% matches. Have all the intelligent men fled the site? And what's with all the guys who look like gangsters?

So, I realize, turning my profile back on means I now have the equivalent of a second job, if I want anything to come out of it. Lots of work to do... so I start digging, reading, checking out their answers to questions I deem important, and so on. I wrote to three guys I thought seem interesting, smart, and witty. Oh, and good-looking, too. Two did not answer.

But one did. He actually is smart, funny, and interesting, and a 99% match. Oh, and good-looking, too. Sent me a link to a delightfully entertaining YouTube video that had me laughing and smiling for a good long time after watching it. And he's curious about stuff in my profile - which means, folks, that... ta-da, he read it - yay! Milestone! Very promising. I guess we'll see... so far, I likey.

So, I'm feeling a wee bit hopeful - but it's rough out there, people. Really rough. I'd forgotten! Maybe I need a strategy. Suggestions welcome!
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Hot chick in the city.

Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me.
~Bryan Ferry

Last edited by nycindie; 01-21-2014 at 11:00 AM.
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  #1363  
Old 01-21-2014, 11:58 AM
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YouAreHere YouAreHere is offline
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Absolutely DESTROYED my lower back over the past few days, to the point where I went home sick yesterday due to another creeping crud I caught, and spent the day in bed with pillows up under my knees. Feeling so much like an old gimpy woman right now, and it's driving me bananas.

Driving aggravates it, which doesn't help when I feel good enough to work, but don't know if I'll be able to get myself out of my car when I get there.

Oh, and more snow tonight. Wheee... At least P will be here, since I think shoveling is right out for me at the moment.

On a related note, I think I overdosed on episodes of "Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee" while I was in bed.

Okay, hack, cough, wheeze, ow. Time to get going to work. Maybe
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Dramatis personae:
Me: Mono, in an LTR with Chops
Chops (previously known as 'P'): partner and best friend. Poly. In LTRs with me and Xena, and dating Noa.
Xena (previously known as M1): My metamour, Poly. Also in an LTR with Chops. Dating Noa and some others.
Noa (previously AG): Dating Chops and Xena (individually).

My navel-gazing blog thread:
A Mono's Journey Into Poly-Land (or, "Aw hell, there's no road map?!")
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  #1364  
Old 01-21-2014, 02:25 PM
Ariakas Ariakas is offline
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Been busy as heck. Newborn is keeping me hopping.. haven't had time for very much. This is my first day back to work since he has been born. Should be interestingly distracting haha
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  #1365  
Old 02-06-2014, 02:03 AM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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Feeling good, basically. Had yesterday and today off from work, which was sorely needed. I'd been feeling a bit run-down. I normally don't have two days off in a row during my regular work-week, so I was able to relax and get some things done.

Been conversing in emails with someone I met online at OKCupid. I had initiated contact with him there, and his replies have been really, really great. He's intelligent, good-looking, really witty, and non-monogamous. Today I told him I'd like to get together with him when he gets back from an upcoming trip. So, we'll see.

Also decided I am going to refinish the wood floors in my apartment. They really need an overhaul and I found a company that does it with a dustless, environmentally-friendly technique. Going to call them next week to get a quote.

Wish I had a few more days off from work, though. Not looking forward to tomorrow. One of the people that works there has been a total beeyotch to me.

Oh well, life goes on.
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Hot chick in the city.

Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me.
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  #1366  
Old 02-06-2014, 02:58 AM
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Inyourendo Inyourendo is offline
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Got a date Saturday night. This guy I met at my friends work a couple years ago. I told her I liked him but she went after him and she kind of messed him up. Timing wasn't right for me either. He actually works for my company and we run into each other from time to time. Looking forward to it
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  #1367  
Old 02-06-2014, 05:06 PM
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BrigidsDaughter BrigidsDaughter is offline
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Haven't been around for a while due to having had multiple surgeries in the last 3 weeks. I just got out of the hospital on Tuesday and am starting to feel more like myself - a tired and sore version, sure, but myself none the less. Unfortunately, they were unable to do my second surgery laparoscopicly, due to there being more centralized, severe scar tissue in my ileum than the CT scan showed. The good news was they had to remove less of my intestines than expected. Bad news is I have an incision that is much bigger/ uglier than I was prepared for. I go back to the doctor in a week. Hopefully by then I'll be feeling better about it all.
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  #1368  
Old 02-14-2014, 04:53 AM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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Glad to see you posting here again, BrigidsDaughter, and glad you are up and around again after having surgery. I hope everything goes well with your recovery and any more procedures you might need.


I had a phone convo last night with this guy I've been messaging on OKC for about two weeks. We spoke for a little over an hour. There was a little initial awkwardness, but we were both obviously enjoying talking to each other. We have tentative plans to meet up next Friday, after work. I get a good vibe from him, and am looking forward to meeting him, but I'm not letting myself get too excited or hopeful about it - you never really know until you meet them in person. But it's nice having a possibility come my way.

Since having re-enabled my OKCupid account, I am just floored by the number of stupid, shallow men who contact me with absolutely nothing of value to say. "Hi sweetheart, nice [insert physical attribute], love to get to know you." Yeah, right. And I guess the fact that so many women on the site have a policy of simply refusing to respond to any messages means that most of the quality men won't make contact first. They feel it's a waste of their time and effort, so will only engage with women who contact them first. So, the guy I'm meeting next week is someone I did contact first -- I wrote to compliment his profile as it is so very clever and entertaining -- and our correspondence has been really awesome, but it would be nice to be pursued by some intelligent men who at least have a clue rather than the 20% Match dumbasses that usually turn up in my Inbox. Sometimes doing the online dating thing is so draining and feels like a second job.

Had a snow day today, but going back to work tomorrow. Feeling okay. Not great, but okay is okay.
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Hot chick in the city.

Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me.
~Bryan Ferry

Last edited by nycindie; 02-14-2014 at 04:57 AM.
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  #1369  
Old 02-17-2014, 01:55 AM
MeeraReed MeeraReed is offline
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Glad to hear you're dipping back into the online dating waters, NYCindie! I do miss your blog. Best of luck with everything.

I know what you mean about OKC being like having a second job. I closed my profile last fall because it was too much work to sort through all the dumb messages.
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  #1370  
Old 03-21-2014, 11:37 PM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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Well, my date with the last guy I wrote about in this thread bombed. No chemistry. He was perfectly nice and we stayed to have dinner after our first cocktails, because the convo seemed to be going well (he even picked up the dinner check), but I could not see myself with him.

However, I have two other prospects now! So that is exciting.
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Hot chick in the city.

Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me.
~Bryan Ferry
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